The Last Day

The final day of school for S, the last day for me before a week's holidays. ahhhh.....

S really wanted to go to school today. The young man that had been doing a school co-op had indicated that he was going to be coming to say goodbye to all of the students, and S really didn't want to miss him. Considering how well they got along, I can understand that.

Apparently S had been a little grouchy yesterday because he didn't get to go on the mountain bike trip, and the A-man said S took it out on him, but it sounds like the A-man dealt with it in a very appropriate way.

I am going to call the school this afternoon to say my final farewell to the Principal. He is a very fair man, and even though I was upset the other day, I really did understand why they were hesitant in allowing S to go on the field trip. I want to express to him, once again, how much we have appreciated all that he has done on our family's behalf, and let him know how much it was appreciated.

I am planning on packing up the boys and heading out the cottage tonight after my fitness class. It will have us arriving quite late, but that will just mean that we will be able to just wake up and enjoy the full day there! Nothing like starting holidays by having a coffee sitting on the dock...

Should be back to the blogging world by Canada Day!

The Fall Out

S took the news better than I thought he might. I guess he had cried when the principal told him he wasn't able to go, but afterwards he was fine. Well, still sad, but not as upset as I thought he would have been.
The principal told S that Hubby and I were too busy to go with him - which annoyed me. I explained to S that I would have been happy to go with him if I had been given a little bit more notice, and I also told him why Hubby wasn't able to go. S knows we will do whatever we can for him, so I felt it a little unfair of the Principal to try and turn it back on us.
S and I also had a conversation about how is actions can cause certain reactions. Of course, he wasn't in an agitated state, so he could rationalize all of it. In an agitated state, not so much. But, maybe this will be another learning tool for him to put in his case. I hope so.

I went to Bear's son's "graduation" last night. I know how excited the A-man was to be finished Grade 8, and I was honoured to have been invited. Magiver won three awards! The sportsmanship award, the Principal award, and the Leadership award. Quite the prestigious awards, I thought. He is such a great kid. The A-man was happy to hear his friend did so well. It was nice to have a 'good' ending to an otherwise not-so-good day.

Today is another sunny, beautiful day. I hope it goes better than yesterday did. I have a number of interviews today with prospective assistants. The one we met with yesterday was quite impressive - I think he may even be a call back.

Not a good day

My heart is breaking today for my wee little man.

The teachers and EA at the school have decided they are not comfortable with the risk of taking him on the field trip tomorrow, and if neither Hubby nor I can attend with S, he is not allowed to go. I have a series of interviews set up for tomorrow that I can not simply cancel, and Hubby’s counterpart is away this week and there is not way he would be able to take the day off to join S on the trip either. Had we known a week ago we might have been able to do something about it. Today – not so much.
As I am writing this I have tears coming to my eyes. Again.

In my heart of hearts I can understand why the school has made this decision; truly I can. But that doesn’t make it any easier to accept. S has been looking forward to going mountain biking with the rest of his class so much.
I haven’t talked to him yet, but when I got the phone call from the Principal, I phoned my mother in law and asked her to pick S up from school. The Principal was going to talk to S and explain why he couldn’t go, but I don’t think he would have been in the best frame of mind to be taking the bus home. Best just to let him be with Gramma where he can be sad and upset without anyone else bugging him.
I had also asked the Principal to ensure that S had cleaned out his desk – he won’t be going back to school. There is no point – tomorrow is the field trip, and then Thursday will just remind him of the fun that he missed by not going. Why torture him any further? Poor wee bogger.

I realize that S’s action of late is the reason for not being able to go. However, I just don’t know if he will be able to put the two (ie. action/reaction) together to the point that it would be able to give him cause to think before acting. Given his ADHD and his Aspergers, I don’t think he will be able to use this cause and effect as a basis for future decisions. He is simply going to look at it as, “I didn’t get to go mountain biking.” Again, had they told me they had cause for concern last week, I might have been able to swing going, but being given the phone call late this morning, there was simply no way my schedule could have been adjusted to fit the request.
I’m not sure whom I am most upset with – the school, S, the fact that I can’t go, or that I can’t do anything to help my wee man.
This just stinks.

Then, to throw more in the mix, I made an error in judgment at the office – which caused my boss a bit of aggravation this morning. He and I have not had the chance to discuss. As I stewing about that, I got a “not good news” email from Cuz about her mother in law (my aunt) and her state of health. When I called my mom with the update, my mom didn’t take the news very well, and then I felt even guiltier.

I am going to have a meeting with boss before I head home for the night. I’m sure he won’t be half as upset about the turn of events as I have been - things will be fine, but I still tend to stew about things. I will have to try and figure out how I am going to get in to the city to see my Aunt in the hospital, but I am sure I will be able to figure that out once I sit down and look at things.

Coping with S, and his hurt wee feelings may be a little more difficult. Should be a fun night.

Past Weekend

The family headed up to the cottage again this past weekend. (Actually, that is where we are going to be for the next few weekends!)
The thing that was unique for us this weekend was that my parents weren't there. They had a wedding to attend, so it was just our family of 4. Hubby and I both had a nice time, and I know the boys always have fun when we are there.

The cottage is actually located on a native reserve. Saturday was Aboriginal Day. We didn't get over to the pow wow on Saturday, though. The boys had asked permission to go, but by the time they started out, the event was already done. The evening fireworks, however, was something the entire family was able to go to. Other than the mosquitoes being bad just prior to the start of the display, I would have to say it was an incredible night! For such a small reserve, they certainly did not spare any expense to celebrate. I was really glad we made it over there.

Today was the A-man's last exam. He is very happy that he is no longer "a dumb niner" and will soon be in the double digits of grades. I hadn't thought about that until he mentioned that at dinner, but I guess that is the case.
S didn't go to school today. Given the turn of events on Friday, and then knowing that today was going to be the Grade 8 graduation - at the choas that goes with that - I opted to have him stay home and simply take it easy. Again, I know they wouldn't be doing any actual work, so I didn't feel like I was a bad parent. Sometimes staying home and out of the excitement is just what he needs.
S is going to go to school tomorrow, though. He wants to show his EA that he can have a good day - a day without incidents - so that she won't be so nervous about him going on the mountain biking expedition on Wednesday. He is very excited about getting to do that. I'm not sure if he will go on the last day, so I will get him to make sure his desk is empty tomorrow - just in case.

I am off on holidays next week, so the boys and I are going to head up to the cottage on Thursday night. Hubby is working nights, so he won't be arriving until late Saturday morning. We will likely stay at the cottage until Canada Day (July 1st) but a lot of what we do will depend on my sister in law. She is visiting from England and I know the boys will not want to miss the chance to see their favourite aunt. We will likely head back on Thursday or Friday of the next weekend to finish off our holidays.
Can you tell we love it up there??

Crazy week

Have a crazy week looming...

Today will be full of strategic meetings with bosses, and new sales rep. Then tomorrow will be starting to implement new plans, and in the afternoon, first of interviews for new assistant.
Wednesday is three more interviews and Thursday another one. Boss is leaving the office on Thursday around noon, and I think I will call it done by around 4:30 that night. Then - off for a week's holiday. I am going to need that week off!

When will I learn?

When, exactly, am I going to learn to keep my trap shut?

I just had to go and jinx things this morning by posting my "good year" post. I didn't even make it to WORK this morning when I got a phone call from the school telling me that S had an incident on the bus, and had taken off from the school property.

Following his safe plan, S is not to be allowed to remain at school when he leaves the school property. Oh, I was so not impressed.

When I got to the school, the teacher in charge wasn't even 100% sure of where S had gone to. I asked if it was possible that he was in the special ed room, as that is where he is supposed to go when aggitated. We headed down that way and found S's EA there. She told us that he had locked himself in the bathroom.
I knocked and asked S to let me in. He refused. I asked a few times, actually. After a while, I finally gave up trying to actually get in to the washroom, and just asked him to tell me - through the door - what had happened to get him so upset. He started to tell me, but after a few minutes, another EA started talking with S's, and I could no longer hear him. I told him I could hear him, and he let me in the washroom.

We talked about the event of the morning, and what he did wrong, and the possible solutions we could come up with to ease things for him for the rest of the school year. (Which is only 4 days.)
After we reached an agreement, I encouraged him to take the 'meeting' outside so that we could fill the EA and the teacher in charge in on what had transpired.

The teacher in charge had gone to get the other child's story while I was trying to coax S out of the washroom. By the time she had returned, the majority of the story had been shared with the EA, and the EA had a chance to voice her concerns about S's behaviour of late, and the upcoming field trip. I think he understands the severity of her (and mine) concern. I'm hoping so, anyway.

When the teacher in charge heard S's version of what happened, she did indicate to S that she had obviously not heard the whole story - except for the parts where S had done some incorrect things (such as taking off his seat belt to move locations on the moving van.)

Anyway, by 9:35, I was leaving the school with S in tow. I took him to work with me, and had him work on his worksheets. He was very good to sit and do all of the homework that he had, and didn't start to run out of things to do until close to lunch time. I made him a quick sandwich in the kitchen, then finished up a few more things on my desk and then left for the day.
We picked up the A-man at my parents house, as he had called around 11:30 to let me know he was done his exam.
I am doing the last of the laundry, and I think we will be all packed and ready to go to the cottage by the time Hubby arrives home from work. I think he and I are going to have some serious conversation about the rest of the week, and S's attendance.

What a flipping day.

The end of another year...

Soon, another school year will be done.

The A-man is writing his English exam today - had his Math one yesterday. He is already finished his Phys-ed exam - for some reason they did it before the exam time was supposed to start. On Monday he has is Religion exam, and then my man is finished for the year.

S's school year is over next Thursday. Less than a week away. I guess Monday night is the Grade 8 'graduation' so there won't be much in the form of classes for him that day, I would imagine. Wednesday they are going on a "field trip." They are going mountain biking. (When he had his outburst, and I told him he wouldn't have to go to school for the rest of the year, that was the only exemption he had - he wanted to go and do that.)

We have survived it. This year was MUCH better than others, that is for sure. I am hoping it is the start of the upward trend for this family.

Another outburst

At work yesterday afternoon, I’m in a meeting and I hear my cell phone ringing in my purse. Normally I turn the phone off when I get to work because a) I don’t get good reception in the office and b) People that would phone me know my work hours and would call me at the office.

Well, it was a good thing I had forgot to turn my phone off when I came back from my lunch meeting. When I listened to the message, it was the school’s Principal, calling to tell me that S was having some troubles and was refusing to get out of the school vehicle. The message went on to tell me that if I didn’t get back to him quickly, he was going to have no other option than to contact the police to get assistance through that route.

I quickly called the school back, and got the answering machine. I waited about 10 seconds, and then called back again. This time I was able to get through. The Principal came on the phone and started to tell me what was going on. He wasn’t fully aware of the situation, but the biggest problem was that it was obvious S was agitated, and neither the Principal nor the EA felt it wise to allow him to take the Van home in such a mood. (Given that this is a special ed van for behavioural-isssue children, I could sort of understand that.)

I asked if the Principal had a cordless phone that he could take out to S in the van so that I could talk to him and try and coax him out of the van. He said they would call back with a cordless. A few minutes later, the phone rings in my office, and it’s the Principal handing the phone over to S. S sounds like a storm cloud. I try to reason with him, and encourage him to just get out of the van so that the driver and the other child could leave. I explained that he wasn’t in trouble, and that I would be there very soon to pick him up, but he continued to refuse to get out.
After a few minutes, I told S that if he just got out of the van “right now, without arguing” he wouldn’t have to go to school for the rest of the school year. He hopped out without and further words needed.

In my head, I was wondering if that was the best promise to make to him, but with being more than 15 minutes away from the school, I just didn’t know what else to suggest. I also didn’t really know what had lead up to the explosion, so part of me was thinking “He may be getting suspended anyway…so who cares?” They only have another 5 days of school, and I know there won’t be much covered in the Grade 7 class in these days considering the Grade 8’s are away for the rest of this week, and then graduation is next week. This wouldn’t be a hard promise to keep.

I got to the school, and was actually quite surprised to see that the EA was still there. (I figured she would head for the hills as soon as S was off the bus.) We had a sit down with S to discuss the events of the afternoon. Turns out he was agitated about 20 minutes before school ended from a couple of boys in the class. The EA had kept him in a secluded area to try and calm down, and when the bell rang, S just took off and got in the van. EA didn’t feel it was safe to allow S to take the school vehicle home when he was still quite visibly distressed. Again, I can understand that.
I also told them that I felt 95% confident that S’s dark mood would have lifted the moment the van left the school property. However, the other child that takes the van has a way of annoying S with a simple word or look, and it wouldn’t have taken much to set S off again.

I totally understand the school’s position on this entire event. I was greatly annoyed that I had to leave the office early, and abruptly, but I was very glad that there didn’t have to be any police involvement. Apparently the Principal was on the phone with the police when I was finally able to get through.
I asked why he called my cell phone, not my work number, and he informed me that was the only number the secretary provided him with. I suggested he needed to take that particular issue up with the secretary – I could tell he wasn’t pleased to discover I have about 5 telephone numbers listed for emergencies and he had only been given one.

After S left the room, I made sure that both the principal and the EA were aware that with Aspergers S isn’t able to self-regulate the way they were telling him he needed to. (Just needed to make sure they really ‘got’ it.) They both did, but also told me that by repeating the same information over again, they hope to make it more rote in meaning for S, which will then become something he might start to do. Long process, this.

I told them that just on the weekend Hubby had commented that a big blow up at school would probably be happening soon, and the EA told me that they have been waiting for it for the past two weeks. Gee – do we all know this child?
This morning S informed me that he was not going to go to school. I told him that was fine, but he would have a few chores to complete throughout the course of the day. He decided to go to school. :o)

Our weekend

We spent the past weekend at the cottage, and for the most part it was great. The weather forecast wasn't promising a very nice weekend, but it was wrong. Thankfully.

Friday night was just my mom and I - with the boys, of course. We sat outside for most of the night, but sometime around 10:30 it started to rain, so we headed inside. She and I just talked and talked all night. It was really fun to have just the two of us together.
Saturday was sunny and beautiful, and we puttered in the gardens, and around the yard. My Dad arrived in the middle of the afternoon and Hubby closed to dinner.
The adults went to a "Buck n Doe" for a couple we know that are getting married in September. It was really nice to go and get to see a number of friends we haven't seen in quite a while. Cuz was there, and if you are a regular reader, you know how happy I would have been to see her. Of course, I didn't get to spend any real quality time with her, but it was nice to see her anyway.

When we left the cottage to head to the dance, the A-man had pulled out the laptop and was working on an English essay about To Kill a Mockingbird. He told me that he really didn't care for the book all that much, but he did finish it, and he actually retained a lot of detail about a book he 'didn't like.' (I don't think it was so much that he didn't like it as it isn't the type of book he normally would pick for himself.)
When we got home, he had done all of the supper dishes, and straightened up the whole kitchen and dining room area. I was really pleased to see that he did that.

Sunday dawned hot and beautiful, again. I spent most of my day moving between the shade on the dock to the sun on the yard. I thanked the A-man earlier in the day for doing the dishes, and gave him some "mom bucks" for it. S thought he should get some to go to the store, also, but I told him, "If you do the work, you get paid. No work, no pay." He sat and pouted while the A-man and Presley - the little boy that was over watching TV and had helped with the dishes - went to the store to buy their rewards for doing the work. I think S learned that lesson - neither of the boys shared their goodies with him - and I am hoping he remembers that when a similar situation arises.

Somewhere around 2pm, the A-man and S and Presley were all swimming in the lake, and for whatever reason, the A-man got extremely agitated at his brother. He was yelling and screaming at him. I went down to the dock and explained that he needed to stop yelling - it was going to disturb the other cottages, and it was also not quite so necessary. He continued and continued. My mother talked with him. Hubby talked to him about the continuing on. After another bout of it, I had enough.
I told him to get out of the water, get dressed, and get packed. He and I were going home. (This was one advantage to both Hubby and I having our own vehicles there, I suppose...) Within 15 minutes, we were in the car and heading home. I was furious with him.

It probably took about half an hour of driving before I was actually calm enough to completely explain why I was so upset with him - and why we left. He had apologized to me about 10 minutes away from the cottage, but I wasn't really ready to hear it at that point. Once I knew I wouldn't lecture, but would actually be able to have a "give and take" conversation, I started to explain what caused me to become upset with him. We actually had a very good conversation. I think part of it was caused by a late night followed by an early morning, but he is also old enough now to realize that having a temper tantrum isn't going to solve anything. In fact, it usually results in all of the fun coming to an end. Which it did when we got in the car to come home.

The A-man finished his essay in the car on the way home. We stopped and got groceries, then he and I had a nice dinner (shrimp and asparagus salad) and watched a movie together. He did his final revisions, printed it off, and went to bed. It was like the whole episode at the cottage had never happened. (This is very typical of R.A.G.E, and that is why as a parent it is so frustrating!!)

Bad, Bad evening

NOT a good night last night. S was in a mood, and the entire house was shaken pretty much to the rafters because of it.

I really dislike him when he gets irrational and ridiculous. Part of me realizes that he isn’t able to regulate his impulses the way a ‘normal’ person does, but the other part of me is just feeling “This has gotten really old, really fast.”

It all started when Hubby asked S to come up and set the table for dinner. The A-man had been MIA since I got home from work, so I couldn’t ask him to give me a hand. Neither of them had emptied the dishwasher before I got home from work, but I didn’t say anything – I figured I would address it during dinner.
Anyway, when S was asked to come up and set the table, his reply to Hubby was, “When this show is done.” (Not the best answer to provide to Hubby when he is on a time line, and knows that dinner is ready to be on the table.)
Hubby came up and told me that he and I would be eating, but since both boys were otherwise occupied, they would not be joining us. He then put out two plates on the table.
A few minutes later, S comes up and asks why there are only two plates. Hubby explained that since he and his brother were too busy to help out around the house, they were obviously too busy to join their parents for dinner.

KABOOM!

I am not going to go into how the next hour of my life went, but suffice it to say, it is not one I want to repeat any time soon. Towards the end of it all, I had lost my patience, I will admit. I didn’t scream and yell like I would have five years ago, but I was not the calming influence I am sure S needed. I am glad that these happen less frequently than they used to, but I will admit I am not used to the feelings I experience when he is having an explosion.

As it turns out, I was to blame for the entire event apparently. See, I had woken him up in the morning, and the entire day was the “worst day of (his) entire life.” Yeah, I didn’t buy that either. (The little devil on my shoulder wanted me to say to him, “The worst day of your life SO FAR…” but I resisted that unnecessary comment.)

So no, I didn’t buy that I was to blame; just like I didn’t buy that he had ‘accidentally’ taken the laser pointer to school – and got in trouble by his teacher - nor that he had ‘accidentally’ threw a ball on the roof of the school – and got his friends upset with him.

I think further discussions will happen tonight – once he is no longer in the heat of the moment, we are often able to discuss things much more rationally than when he is. This morning was a much better morning for us than yesterday was, too, so that bodes well for a better day.
Here’s hoping.

Nice surprise

A friend of mine - the one that camped out on my couch a while back - came over last night to pick me up. We were heading into the city (to Dar's) to pick up a loveseat. Incredible that I am such good friends with both ladies and their paths have never crossed before...

Anyway, when I went to get in the truck, there was a pretty pink bag, with the word "Diva" stamped on to it - all full of fluffy pink tissue paper. I went to move the bag in to the backseat of the truck when I was told, "Oh, not there. That is for you!"
Not my birthday for quite a while, so I wasn't quite sure what to expect. Well, the card was basically a "thanks for helping me through the crap I've dealt with over the last little while" type of card. The gift - A D O R A B L E!

See for yourself:

My friend told me that as soon as she saw it she immediately thought of me, and had to buy it. The funny thing is, these is a REASON she thought of me.

These two pictures are items of the real thing in my closet, that I use on a fairly regular basis:


I never realized that I am a true "girlie girl" before. My boys tell me that often, but what do they know?

Wondering what I was so excited about? The first one - my gift - is actually ceramic! It's a piggy bank, and there is a little tag on it that says "Girls Night Out". The other two items are actual purses that I have and use on a regular basis. Although, the one with the pattern has a broken strap and I may have to retire it if I can't figure out how to fix it.

Another friend - Scare's mom - gave me a lamp a few years ago for Christmas, and it looks like a purse with feathers on it too. Hmmm... does this mean my friends all think I'm fluffy?

Oh - and placed inside the handles of the piggy bank there was a magnet. It says, "The Queen is not receiving an audience today."

Perfect.

Day to Day stuff

This morning, the A-man had a follow up orthodontist appointment, so I drove him in to school afterwards. As we were driving to school he was telling me that he had heard a rumour at school that has him all upset. He has heard that his religion teacher - a man he quotes almost on a daily basis - was being fired at the end of the school year. He told me that he asked the teacher about the rumour, but the teacher just told him, "I'm not allowed to discuss this."
Now the A-man is all upset to think that the school would actually get rid of such "a great teacher. The very best teacher (he has) ever had!"
This "going to be fired" just seems a little bit out there to me - just doesn't seem to work in the vein I think a board would work. I tried to explain all of this to the A-man, but he was far too upset to even hear me.

This is one thing that I dislike about the way that the A-man's psyche works. "I've made up my mind. Don't confuse me with the facts." There are no ifs-ands-or-buts, and nothing can sway him. Very much the Aries ram, my guy is. One website describes the Aries individual as

"Their immense energy makes them aggressive and restless, argumentative
occasionally, headstrong, quick tempered, easily offended and capable of holding
grudges if they feel themselves affronted."

Even if you are not a believe in the astrology signs, and what they say about personalities, the above description certainly does describe son number one.

And son number two - he truly lives up to his astrological sign. Taurus - the bull. That was one of my first thoughts when I was told my due date with S - "Oh, great, a Taurus baby. This otta be fun..." He has lived up to many of the descriptions within this star sign. Hubby and I both live up to our signs, too.

Last night after dinner, I went to my fitness class, and Hubby was able to get the A-man outside to bag up some more fire wood. We are having our driveway resealed this coming weekend, so the push is on to finish getting the wood put in the trailer, thereby allowing Hubby the chance to move the boat from our driveway to out of the way in the backyard. (My dad is storing it at our place for a little while.)

The entire time the A-man was doing the wood, S did not attempt to raise one finger. Not even with the promise of "Mom Bucks." He decided that the A-man can have any/all funds earned with the selling of the wood, and now he does nothing to help with it. Not much can make that boy move... (sigh). On the bright side though, he did use that time to finish a book he was reading.

Educating the educator?

Last Thursday, I noticed a note in S's agenda from the EA. The note was written on Tuesday afternoon, and started with "S did not have a good day." It then when on to tell me that unprovoked, S approached another student and told an off-colour 'joke.'
First off, I didn't quite know why a child would need to be "provoked" in to telling a joke, but she obviously felt this way. The note then went on to tell me that when she asked S to go to the Principal's office for saying said joke, he refused. I am thinking that is what really ticked her off - she does not like to be told 'no.'

Anyway... I asked S to tell me what the joke was. He would not tell me. After a little while of my promising that I would not get angry, nor yell at him, he told me the joke. I must say, it was very rude, and really not appropriate. I determined where he had heard the joke - the A-man was in my bad books, I will admit - and then I had to try and figure out if he really even understood the punch line.
S claims that he did not really understand the joke, but when he told it to his first friend, the friend laughed, so he thought he should tell it to others. Hey, it got a laugh, so it must be funny, right? We can't admit that we don't 'get' the joke that others find amusing.
I guess it was while telling the joke to another friend that the EA overheard and told him to go to the office.

I think what bothered me the most was that when S told his EA that he didn't understand the joke, nor why she was angry with him, she told him that she thought that answer was "a bunch of bologna." Umm, PARDON ME? I would think prior to going off the deep end, this type of thing should be determined first, wouldn't you?
I wrote a note back in S's agenda indicating that I didn't think S understood the joke, given his lack of knowledge of such subjects, and I didn't appreciate the 'bunch of bologna' comment. S told me on Friday that the EA did read my note, but she did not to respond to me.

I sent an email to the doctor asking if it really was possible that S did understand the joke and was trying to pull the wool over my eyes. His answer is very hard to interpret, but from what I can get from it is that it is very possible that S was simply repeating the joke to all of his friends because they laughed. He would not have been able to read their faces/reactions to determine that it was off-colour or offensive.
It is a very sexually-innuendo type of joke, and in my gut, I really don't think he understands it. The A-man does for sure, but unless the A-man actually took the time to explain it to S, I really don't think he got it. Well, until the EA took it upon herself to actually explain it to him.
Again, is sex ed within the scope of an EA?

Only a few more weeks left of school. This has been a much better year for S, no doubt about it. I just hope that next year he is given an EA that has knowledge and experience with the multitude of issues that come with my wee little man.

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On to another subject for a second. For regular readers of my blog, you will remember that I have been helping a lady that is trying to obtain special educational needs for her daughter. The school board finally agreed to provide a psycho-ed assessment for her daughter, but it did take a LOT to get to this point. Last week I got a phone call from the Mom telling me that she was going to get the full results on Monday (today), but she got a phone call from the board psychologist - the person that actually read the results - and it turns out that her daughter is developmentally delayed. Apparently her daughter has an IQ around either 60 or 70, I can't remember which. Either way, she is severely delayed, and I find it terrible that a child can get to the age of 13 and be almost finished Grade 7 before this type of thing is learned. An entire elementary school career, full of 'professional educators' have failed this child, in my opinion.

I realize this woman is a rude and overbearing parent. I realize she is harbouring a lot of resentment towards many of the teachers within that school - probably as much as the teachers resent this mother! But that does not excuse the fact that this girl can have such a severe delay and NO ONE caught it! Her report cards have always been B's and C's - with some A's in there. How can a child with an IQ of 60 or 70 be working "at grade level" (as a B mark is supposed to indicate) since she was 4 years old? I think accountability should be demanded in this case, but I am not going to be the person to let her know that.
I guess her daughter is going to get the IPRC she has been wanting... but how sad that this is the result of the fight.

GRRRR

Last night, I spent a fair bit of time surfing the Internet looking for more details about Aspergers. Apparently I have to educate the EA about this disorder.

I am SO tired of this woman. She seems to think that SHE is the judge and the jury with respect to what S knows/doesn't know, and that he can regulate his reations to things based on her giving him a stern, "That is enough of that."

I have put a request in the psychiartist for further details, but this morning I am not happy with her. I am not going to write about the actual 'event' just yet - I am too darn steamed, and that post would just turn in to a big huge rant. Once I have more details from the doctor, and have a chance to calm down, I will provide more details.

Not much happening

I went to the movies with 3 friends last night. We went to see the “Sex in the City” movie.
I am not one to watch much television, and as such never really watched this particular show. But when I was invited, I thought it would be nice to have a ‘girls night out’ so I agreed to go. Turns out only one of us had actually ever watched the show when it was on the air! (She cried through most of the movie, while the rest of us stayed dry eyed.) As we left the theatre, the three of us that had not watched the show all indicated that we thought we should start watching the reruns. I enjoyed the movie, and my night out.

When I got home from the movie, S was pretending to be asleep on the floor in his TV room. He likes to do this ‘pretend’ sleeping a lot lately. Most times I just ignore him and he eventually gets up and heads to his own room, but last night he seemed quite determined to stay ‘sleeping’ on the tile floor. I let him ‘sleep’ for a while.

The A-man had a big project due for phys-ed, and was very upset that he hadn’t been able to print it last night. I was able to correct that issue with one simple click – the default printer had been changed – and suddenly I was “Wonder Mom”. I love still knowing more about technology than my children. I am sure that won’t be for very much longer, though.

After getting the project printed, and reading it over while the A-man explained the project, I went down and ‘woke’ S up to go to his real bed. He was full of snuggles and smooches before he went up to brush his teeth and go to bed. The A-man seemed very anxious to tell me all about his day – he gets upset when I’m not home each night so that we can have our regular routine of “How was your day”, etc. I sometimes wonder if he doesn’t have a wee bit of OCD to accompany his Tourettes. Well, I guess we are all a little obsessive compulsive sometimes, aren’t we?

I did a couple loads of laundry then heading off to slumber myself.

On the work front - he ad for my assistant will be running in the papers for the next little while. I do not want a repeat of the hiring from last Fall, so to prepare I have come up with a test that I will email to all applicants. It’s not difficult at all, and it should help me weed out the people applicants a bit. I hope so…I feel like the ‘down time’ we usually experience during the Spring/Summer just has not arrived.

Tuesday morning

When I woke up this morning, I saw that the A-man wasn’t out of bed yet. This is not usual for him – he usually tries to be up and moving by 7am. When I went to get him out of bed, he complained of not feeling well – he had a sore stomach. I wasn’t too sure. I asked him to get out of bed and start moving – he might find that it felt better after having something to eat, I explained.
As he was sitting there having breakfast, he kept sitting all hunched over, holding his stomach. I asked him where, exactly, the pain was, and he indicated that it was on the lower right side of him abdomen. Hmmm.
After a bit more theatrics, I asked him to go and lie on his bed, and show me exactly where it was hurting. Again, his hand went down to the lower right side of him abdomen. I felt around on his mid-section and he would wince anytime I pressed down. I debated, and debated. Lower right abdominal pain is not something to be ignored.
I asked him if he thought he could wait 15 minutes for me to get his brother up and off, and then I would take him to the hospital.
“Hospital?!,” he said. I said, “Well, lower right abdominal pain isn’t something that can be ignored. We need to get it checked out. Or could it be that you are just exaggerating just a bit?”
Yeah, turns out he was just faking – he wanted to sleep in. Little brat. He may be good in drama class, but this Mom was a kid once too – a kid that tried just about anything! He very quickly got up and dressed and ready for school. He apologized to me about 5 times before he finally went outside to catch the bus.
Ya can’t kid a kidder, bud!

Last week, S suggested we start a “Mom Bucks” program. Generally, S is very lazy when it comes to doing his household chores. We have a weekly allowance system in place, but he rarely earns the full amount. He suggested that we start a program where he can earn his “Mom Bucks” every single time he does his chores.
He had some poker-type chips from a board game, and told me that every time he does a chore that he is asked to do, I then give him the proper ‘money’ for that job. He can then accumulate the “Mom Bucks” until he is ready to cash them in for real money. I thought, “Why not?”
We have been using the “Mom Bucks” program for just over a week now. He has just under $5 – which is his weekly allowance amount. A few times I asked him to do a certain thing for me and then I forgot to award the “Mom Bucks,” but he has never questioned me about how many ‘bucks’ he will get for things. On the weekend, when I had him sweep the front porch, and clean all the cobwebs from the walls, he was THRILLED to be given 50 cents. (Child labour, I know…)
The A-man opted not to go with the program – he likes to accumulate all of his weekly allowance on the calendar, and then cash it all in when he has larger sums of money – like $50 for a video game. That is his way of saving.
Apparently I am not allowed to take back “Mom Bucks” – once they are given, they are his to keep and cash in when needed. A form of punishment cannot be the loss of “Mom Bucks.” I could tell he had spent a fair amount of time coming up with this program. We will see how long it lasts.

...how does your garden grow?

For a day that was supposed to be rainy and crappy, I must say I was quite pleased with how yesterday turned out!
Hubby and I had an appointment with our nutritionist in the morning, and when I got home from the appointment, I went out to play in the dirt!
My veggie garden is pretty much all planted now. Put in a row each of red leaf lettuce and green leaf lettuce, and 4 plants of head lettuce, a row of swiss chard, a row of 'Purple Haze' carrots, 4 green pepper plants and 4 brussel sprout plants. Also did some radish rows in and around the onion sets - I don't like radishes, but Hubby does, and since they are such a fast growing veggie, I always do them for him.
The centre part of the veggie garden I got all prepped, and then had to consult with hubby - do we want to do potatoes in this area again, or should I got with beans and peas? He decided beans and peas, so I picked up the seeds yesterday afternoon, and will fill that section later today if time permits. (We are having some friends over for a barbeque to celebrate Hubby's birthday, so I may not get time today.)
The third part of the garden is dedicated to tomatoes, cucumbers and zucchini. The plants that take up so much room. I purchased all of the tomato plants this year - just had no time for starting seedlings. I've got two heirloom plants - they produce a mid-sized orange tomato in clusters, and the plant will grow to about 6 feet tall. Thinking I will need to get some heavy-duty cages for those two plants. Then planted 4 beef steak tomato plants, 4 burpee tomatoes - which are a fleshier, firmer tomato - and 4 tiny tim plants, just because I love have wee little tomatoes in my salads. Got one cucumber plant, and one zucchini plant, and the on impulse I purchased a red pepper plant and figure I will put it in by the rhubarb.

I was really pleased with my veggie garden efforts yesterday. We have had the veggie garden since we moved in to this house in the Spring of '99, but for the last few years, I have never quite gotten the entire thing planted. Last year I planted the onion sets - which are doing great this year - and two types of potatoes, and that was about it. There were a few plants that I put in, but they never really did much of anything mainly because I rarely even watered out there. Now that I actually have a number of things in the ground, I know I will be more vigilent about it. Plus the boys have ceased a lot of their extra-cirricular activies, which then allows me the chance to spend more time on MY things.
S will also have the opportunity to earn "Mom Bucks" by weeding the various rows, too. (Will do another post about "Mom bucks" later this week.)

The A-man filled in his very first application for a job yesterday, so I don't know if I will be able to ask him to help out much with the garden, but I guess there will be days that he is home during the summer, right?

Flowers are doing so well. So many colours and smells...I am hoping to get out there with the camera soon, and then I will post some pictures of the various areas.