This morning I signed on to Facebook to discover Bear's son had written a poem for my 40th birthday.
He was at my 'surprise' birthday party on Saturday night, and I think he had a fun time.
I was the first to change his diaper because his mom didn't know what to do with "the extra parts" that her then two-year daughter didn't have. I visited him in the hospital when his ashama was bad, and his mom was exhausted and needed a break.
One year, he came trick or treating with me and my sons - just because.
When he won an award at his Grade 8 graduation, I think I was beaming as much as him own mom! ( took lots of pictures!!)
He's 14, and a great kid. I love him dearly; and from this poem (which his mom told me took him 45 minutes to write...) I would say the feeling is mutual.
I feel so loved. :o)
~~
I've know you since I was born
I've know you since i first ate corn.
You've watch, you've listened;
You've cared all along
And all I can think is that it's been way too long.
I miss the times we had
Even if i was mad.
Because I know
That you show
The true qualities of a friend.
You've been there through the good and the bad,
The happy and the sad,
And no matter what you've never been mad ...( at least not at me :) )
If there's one thing that I can say
It's that there's no one I would rather have as a replacement mom.
I don't see you a lot, but I know when I see your face that I'm ok; and if I ever need you, that you will be there and that is my gift to you; if being the one who cares if no one else does the one who will listen if needed, and the one who idiolizes you for being you. Caring and generous, more then happy to help - that is you. That is my replacement mom; that is Jori the yesterday- birthday girl.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Friday, September 12, 2008
Fridays & weekends
aaahhh.... Friday evening.... I love Friday evenings. Sitting here with my sweatpants on, warm comfy shirt... all is quiet in the house. Fridays are, quite simply, the best way to start a weekend. :o)
This morning was pretty good for getting the boys off to school. I was tired again, and not really wanting to get out of bed, but after I got motivated to do so, everything else just sort of fell in to place.
After work I had an appointment, then went to have coffee with a friend of mine. Now, I'm sitting here trying to warm up from the damp, wet outside, and trying to figure out my plan of attack on the household chores that need to be completed. Laundry is almost caught up, too.
It's hard when I have work weekends - I feel like I missed so much when I am away for one. I don't get the same amount of down time, I don't get to just BE.
I'm really working on letting myself simply BE. I follow a blog where the blogger often talks about the importance of living in the moment, and when I read her wise words, I often find myself wishing I was able to do that. I simply can't get my mind to live in the current moment; to not think about doing a) then b) and then c.) I can see how that approach can be very beneficial - I just have to learn how to do this.
Maybe someday.
Have a nice weekend, all. I know I am looking forward to mine - even if the weather isn't going to be the best!
This morning was pretty good for getting the boys off to school. I was tired again, and not really wanting to get out of bed, but after I got motivated to do so, everything else just sort of fell in to place.
After work I had an appointment, then went to have coffee with a friend of mine. Now, I'm sitting here trying to warm up from the damp, wet outside, and trying to figure out my plan of attack on the household chores that need to be completed. Laundry is almost caught up, too.
It's hard when I have work weekends - I feel like I missed so much when I am away for one. I don't get the same amount of down time, I don't get to just BE.
I'm really working on letting myself simply BE. I follow a blog where the blogger often talks about the importance of living in the moment, and when I read her wise words, I often find myself wishing I was able to do that. I simply can't get my mind to live in the current moment; to not think about doing a) then b) and then c.) I can see how that approach can be very beneficial - I just have to learn how to do this.
Maybe someday.
Have a nice weekend, all. I know I am looking forward to mine - even if the weather isn't going to be the best!
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Better morning. Only slightly though
For the third day in a row, I have found myself getting angry with S because he just won't get out of bed!
This morning, though, when I went in to his room to get him up, I woke him with a glass of water and his medications in my hand. I thought that if I got the ADHD medication in to him right away, maybe the rest of the morning would go a little smoother than normal. After he actually got up, it did go better.
That's the trick - get the meds in to the body as soon as they wake up. (Will repeat this step for sure.)
Hubby had the task of making sure S completed his homework last night. It was Science, I do believe. S brought his laptop home for the first time this year, too. He told me that his scanner still isn't working, but the principal and the SERT have both assured him that it will be working within the week.
Had a note in the agenda from the EA the other day about S needing certain things for his French class. Part of the note was crossed off by the SERT asking me to send her an email about this.
The SERT is trying to introduce a Social Skills class to the school, and the class would replace the French class. To date, she hasn't been able to get everything finalized for the class, but the SERT has informed the French teacher of the possible exemption, so I guess they have worked out an accommodated program for S. Again - what a crazy concept. Why didn't I ever think of that in the past?
Oh, that's right - I did. And the teacher refused to have anything to do with any accommodations. Gee, I'm really going to miss that teacher...
The A-man is still really enjoying his Hospitality and Tourism course. He hasn't really said much about the other classes, other than to complain about having a History project assigned on the second day of school. Project is due tomorrow, but he claims he turned it in on Tuesday. I really wish he had let me see the end result before he turned it in. (He needs a bit of assistance with his proof-reading...)
I know I need to let go a bit on the follow up, but I've had to do it for so long, it's a tough one for me to do. I don't want to tell him how to DO the work - I just want to be able to ensure it's his BEST work. (Okay, okay - I hear you... let him turn it in and deal with the consequences. It's just really hard to do that!!)
Had flowers delivered to the office for me yesterday. Pretty autumn coloured centre piece. Jazzy's mom and I met for lunch today, and she gave me a bouquet of sunflowers. I feel so loved. :o)
Cuz gave me the cutest kettle I have ever seen! I will be taking some pictures tonight and should be able to get them on here in a while. I love days that are "all about me!!"
This morning, though, when I went in to his room to get him up, I woke him with a glass of water and his medications in my hand. I thought that if I got the ADHD medication in to him right away, maybe the rest of the morning would go a little smoother than normal. After he actually got up, it did go better.
That's the trick - get the meds in to the body as soon as they wake up. (Will repeat this step for sure.)
Hubby had the task of making sure S completed his homework last night. It was Science, I do believe. S brought his laptop home for the first time this year, too. He told me that his scanner still isn't working, but the principal and the SERT have both assured him that it will be working within the week.
Had a note in the agenda from the EA the other day about S needing certain things for his French class. Part of the note was crossed off by the SERT asking me to send her an email about this.
The SERT is trying to introduce a Social Skills class to the school, and the class would replace the French class. To date, she hasn't been able to get everything finalized for the class, but the SERT has informed the French teacher of the possible exemption, so I guess they have worked out an accommodated program for S. Again - what a crazy concept. Why didn't I ever think of that in the past?
Oh, that's right - I did. And the teacher refused to have anything to do with any accommodations. Gee, I'm really going to miss that teacher...
The A-man is still really enjoying his Hospitality and Tourism course. He hasn't really said much about the other classes, other than to complain about having a History project assigned on the second day of school. Project is due tomorrow, but he claims he turned it in on Tuesday. I really wish he had let me see the end result before he turned it in. (He needs a bit of assistance with his proof-reading...)
I know I need to let go a bit on the follow up, but I've had to do it for so long, it's a tough one for me to do. I don't want to tell him how to DO the work - I just want to be able to ensure it's his BEST work. (Okay, okay - I hear you... let him turn it in and deal with the consequences. It's just really hard to do that!!)
Had flowers delivered to the office for me yesterday. Pretty autumn coloured centre piece. Jazzy's mom and I met for lunch today, and she gave me a bouquet of sunflowers. I feel so loved. :o)
Cuz gave me the cutest kettle I have ever seen! I will be taking some pictures tonight and should be able to get them on here in a while. I love days that are "all about me!!"
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
argh!!!
What. A. Flipping. Morning!!
Last night was a hellish night as I was helping S with his homework.
First off, when I got home from work, I noticed that neither boy did their nightly chores. Then, after dinner we had to broach the whole 'homework' issue.
S had homework in History, Geography and Math. His idea of doing his math was putting a bunch of question marks on his sheet and telling me he was going to get his EA to help him with it. Yeah, that went over like a lead balloon. Little brat simply didn't READ what he was supposed to do. Once I read it to him, it was amazing how quickly those 10 questions were answered.
Fights and tears... yeah, good times.
This morning, like yesterday morning, he was just here, there and everywhere. I just want to scream at him, "WOULD YOU FOCUS FOR JUST 3 MINUTES???!!?!?!?"
My SIL is here this morning because we are going to the funeral in a few hours, and after both boys were gone, she was just shaking her head saying, "I don't know how you do that every day. I would be insane." Gotta love ADHD.
And here is the kicker - it's better than is used to be. I am still going crazy with the nonsense and silliness, and things are better! No wonder I was stressed to the breaking point a few years ago.
Then, to make matters worse, the A-man is outside waiting for his bus and 15 minutes pass. I do not have time today to run him into school. The school is half an hour the opposite way of where we are going and we are on a timeline today. Turns out the driver was a sub and he got lost on our rural roads. Showed up almost 20 minutes late, going the wrong way on our street...
The A-man sent me a text telling me to take a deep breath. (snicker...)
Probably doesn't help that SIL made Hubby and I sit up with her and have a couple glasses of wine last night...
Last night was a hellish night as I was helping S with his homework.
First off, when I got home from work, I noticed that neither boy did their nightly chores. Then, after dinner we had to broach the whole 'homework' issue.
S had homework in History, Geography and Math. His idea of doing his math was putting a bunch of question marks on his sheet and telling me he was going to get his EA to help him with it. Yeah, that went over like a lead balloon. Little brat simply didn't READ what he was supposed to do. Once I read it to him, it was amazing how quickly those 10 questions were answered.
Fights and tears... yeah, good times.
This morning, like yesterday morning, he was just here, there and everywhere. I just want to scream at him, "WOULD YOU FOCUS FOR JUST 3 MINUTES???!!?!?!?"
My SIL is here this morning because we are going to the funeral in a few hours, and after both boys were gone, she was just shaking her head saying, "I don't know how you do that every day. I would be insane." Gotta love ADHD.
And here is the kicker - it's better than is used to be. I am still going crazy with the nonsense and silliness, and things are better! No wonder I was stressed to the breaking point a few years ago.
Then, to make matters worse, the A-man is outside waiting for his bus and 15 minutes pass. I do not have time today to run him into school. The school is half an hour the opposite way of where we are going and we are on a timeline today. Turns out the driver was a sub and he got lost on our rural roads. Showed up almost 20 minutes late, going the wrong way on our street...
The A-man sent me a text telling me to take a deep breath. (snicker...)
Probably doesn't help that SIL made Hubby and I sit up with her and have a couple glasses of wine last night...
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Not a doctor
I’ve had someone ask me about my opinions on the non-medical aspects of treating disorders such as my sons.
Would I consider alternative therapies? Sure, I would consider them, but I would also ask my medical professional their opinions about such therapies, I would do a lot of reading and research on these therapies, and I would also talk to the person that would be administering said therapies before I made a final judgment call.
Would I recommend therapies 1. 2. and 3. as an alternative for someone else’s child? Nope.
I am not a doctor, do not claim to have any education within the medical field, nor an expert on anything that is medically related. Quite simply, I am a parent that has learned over the years to cope with the disorders that affect my sons.
Now, when I learned about S’s Asperger’s, I will admit that I talked about it with my chiropractor. I talked about it with him more because he is a friend than anything else, but I also wanted his opinion on the left brain/right brain theories I had read about.
He suggested that weekly treatments may help determine a pattern of behaviour, but also indicated that he would have to provide treatment for quite a while to really start to formulate and track a pattern based on the manipulations required and the behavioural aspects. The adjustments would focus strictly on the 1st and 2nd sections of the spine – no other manipulations would be done.
Prior to starting this treatment, I did send an email to S’s doctor asking if he thought this type of treatment would be detrimental in any way. The doctor surprised me when he replied saying that there having been some studies on the manipulation of certain segments of the spine, but he didn’t know that this treatment would actually be of a benefit to S. After some careful consideration, Hubby and I thought we would go ahead with the treatments. If the chiro was able to determine something within the time frame we had established, great. If not, that was fine too.
Over the time that S was going to see the chiro on a weekly basis, we did notice that the base of the skull did tend to pull to the right more than normal, but there was never a set pattern established. We didn’t continue with the treatments over the summer simply because of the geographical constraints. Nothing has been discussed for this school year, and to be honest, I am not sure that it was a necessary expense.
Sometimes I feel that alternative therapies also have to be worth the cost. Most medical plans don’t cover the cost of alternative therapies; which can get very costly over the long run. Another consideration – why do you want to look at alternative therapies? Is it because you don’t trust conventional Western medicine, or is it because you don’t want to give your child drugs? These are all very personal choices; ones that only you can make.
My only advice – let the buyer beware. There are no magical remedies out there that will be able to ‘cure’ these disorders. There are no cures – if there were, we would already know about them. Many companies that sell natural remedies make claims, but there is no quantifiable proof that they really do work in the way advertised.
If you are considering herbal supplements, or special diet, make sure you are well informed, and very comfortable with the person that will be assisting. Check out their background, and their education. If you are unsure, don’t start your child on anything until you ARE sure.
LEV, thanks for reading my blog and asking me my opinion. I really do understand how difficult and upseting it is during the time of looking for what may be going on with your child. I’m sorry if I haven’t been able to answer your questions more clearly; if you would like, you can email me directly at lupusawareness(at)hotmail(dot)com and we can get in to more specifics.
Would I consider alternative therapies? Sure, I would consider them, but I would also ask my medical professional their opinions about such therapies, I would do a lot of reading and research on these therapies, and I would also talk to the person that would be administering said therapies before I made a final judgment call.
Would I recommend therapies 1. 2. and 3. as an alternative for someone else’s child? Nope.
I am not a doctor, do not claim to have any education within the medical field, nor an expert on anything that is medically related. Quite simply, I am a parent that has learned over the years to cope with the disorders that affect my sons.
Now, when I learned about S’s Asperger’s, I will admit that I talked about it with my chiropractor. I talked about it with him more because he is a friend than anything else, but I also wanted his opinion on the left brain/right brain theories I had read about.
He suggested that weekly treatments may help determine a pattern of behaviour, but also indicated that he would have to provide treatment for quite a while to really start to formulate and track a pattern based on the manipulations required and the behavioural aspects. The adjustments would focus strictly on the 1st and 2nd sections of the spine – no other manipulations would be done.
Prior to starting this treatment, I did send an email to S’s doctor asking if he thought this type of treatment would be detrimental in any way. The doctor surprised me when he replied saying that there having been some studies on the manipulation of certain segments of the spine, but he didn’t know that this treatment would actually be of a benefit to S. After some careful consideration, Hubby and I thought we would go ahead with the treatments. If the chiro was able to determine something within the time frame we had established, great. If not, that was fine too.
Over the time that S was going to see the chiro on a weekly basis, we did notice that the base of the skull did tend to pull to the right more than normal, but there was never a set pattern established. We didn’t continue with the treatments over the summer simply because of the geographical constraints. Nothing has been discussed for this school year, and to be honest, I am not sure that it was a necessary expense.
Sometimes I feel that alternative therapies also have to be worth the cost. Most medical plans don’t cover the cost of alternative therapies; which can get very costly over the long run. Another consideration – why do you want to look at alternative therapies? Is it because you don’t trust conventional Western medicine, or is it because you don’t want to give your child drugs? These are all very personal choices; ones that only you can make.
My only advice – let the buyer beware. There are no magical remedies out there that will be able to ‘cure’ these disorders. There are no cures – if there were, we would already know about them. Many companies that sell natural remedies make claims, but there is no quantifiable proof that they really do work in the way advertised.
If you are considering herbal supplements, or special diet, make sure you are well informed, and very comfortable with the person that will be assisting. Check out their background, and their education. If you are unsure, don’t start your child on anything until you ARE sure.
LEV, thanks for reading my blog and asking me my opinion. I really do understand how difficult and upseting it is during the time of looking for what may be going on with your child. I’m sorry if I haven’t been able to answer your questions more clearly; if you would like, you can email me directly at lupusawareness(at)hotmail(dot)com and we can get in to more specifics.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Weekend of endings...
Another weekend show - done. Thankfully.
Friday - rained. Saturday morning - misty rain, then rest of day was beautiful. Sunday - rained all morning and into afternoon. What a weekend to be participating in an outdoor event...
When we arrived to our booth this morning, I discovered our booth had been vandalized. It was a terrible feeling to see everything strewn about. Although it's not the same as a home being broken in to, I can certainly understand how a person would simply feel angry at having a stranger go through your things. Fortunately we don't keep anything of any real value in our booth - marketing literature isn't really something vandals go for. They showed their dissatisfaction by dumping bins, tossing papers and (for whatever reason) tossing ballots around the area. What a great way to start the day. In the rain.
Overall, I think the show went well, though. We had a chance to meet some really nice people, and we had some fun. I'm sure this will be an event we will particpate in again.
My aunt passed away this morning. We knew it was just a matter of time, but when Hubby called me with the news this morning, it still felt like a blow to the solar plex.
Called my Mom right after speaking with Hubby. She seemed to be okay, but she is in the city now and will be going with my cousin to make the final funeral arrangements. Most things had been taken care of a while ago, but I'm sure it will be a very difficult day for both of them tomorrow.
I haven't cried yet, but I know I will when I see my other family members. I don't know how my aunt's partner will be, either. He was aware of how sick she was, but he has been quite ill for the last couple of years and she was the primary care giver to him. He is going to be lost without her - we all figure it is just a matter of time for him now. So sad.
When I talked to my Mom this afternoon, it appeared the funeral would be on Wednesday, but I guess we will know more after they meet with the funeral directors in the morning.
My brother left for Afganistan on Saturday morning. He had been home from his last tour for exactly one year and four days. I know the military likes to give a one-year time between leaves, but only waiting 4 extra days just doesn't seem right to me. I don't even know if he knows about my aunt yet or not. Will talk to SIL tomorrow when I return home.
Feeling sleepy now... off to bed...
Friday - rained. Saturday morning - misty rain, then rest of day was beautiful. Sunday - rained all morning and into afternoon. What a weekend to be participating in an outdoor event...
When we arrived to our booth this morning, I discovered our booth had been vandalized. It was a terrible feeling to see everything strewn about. Although it's not the same as a home being broken in to, I can certainly understand how a person would simply feel angry at having a stranger go through your things. Fortunately we don't keep anything of any real value in our booth - marketing literature isn't really something vandals go for. They showed their dissatisfaction by dumping bins, tossing papers and (for whatever reason) tossing ballots around the area. What a great way to start the day. In the rain.
Overall, I think the show went well, though. We had a chance to meet some really nice people, and we had some fun. I'm sure this will be an event we will particpate in again.
My aunt passed away this morning. We knew it was just a matter of time, but when Hubby called me with the news this morning, it still felt like a blow to the solar plex.
Called my Mom right after speaking with Hubby. She seemed to be okay, but she is in the city now and will be going with my cousin to make the final funeral arrangements. Most things had been taken care of a while ago, but I'm sure it will be a very difficult day for both of them tomorrow.
I haven't cried yet, but I know I will when I see my other family members. I don't know how my aunt's partner will be, either. He was aware of how sick she was, but he has been quite ill for the last couple of years and she was the primary care giver to him. He is going to be lost without her - we all figure it is just a matter of time for him now. So sad.
When I talked to my Mom this afternoon, it appeared the funeral would be on Wednesday, but I guess we will know more after they meet with the funeral directors in the morning.
My brother left for Afganistan on Saturday morning. He had been home from his last tour for exactly one year and four days. I know the military likes to give a one-year time between leaves, but only waiting 4 extra days just doesn't seem right to me. I don't even know if he knows about my aunt yet or not. Will talk to SIL tomorrow when I return home.
Feeling sleepy now... off to bed...
Friday, September 5, 2008
Off again...
The vehicle is packed...with a few more things to add...and then I am off for another working weekend. This time is another outdoor event, but in the city. I won't be home until Monday afternoon, and I am a little nervous about it, I will admit.
S seems totally okay with my leaving - but he always does. This morning he has been very silly and I've had to give him many reminders in the past hour. (Not the best way to start a morning, I will confess...)
The A-man is fine about my going away for the weekend, but felt very assured that he had all of the contact information he needs - just in case.
We all went to see the R-man's house last night. It is quite nice, and they look like they have been living there forever. We didn't get to visit as long as I would have liked, but that was my fault because my hairdresser took a lot longer getting rid of the grey...
On my way out the door, R-man's girlfriend (I'm going to call her LF) handed me a couple of gift bags - my 'birthweek' gifts from Cuz. (!!) Love the burning candles and firetruck sounds, btw...
This morning is day one - very nice candle holder.
For the past couple of years, Cuz and I have celebrated our birth weeks. One present a day for the week building up to your actual birthday, with the main gift being #7. We usually go for cute, silly things for the other 6 days, but it just helps build the excitement of having a 'special' day. (I am very much of the belief that a birthday should be celebrated regardless of the age of the person! :o) )
And... I am off!
S seems totally okay with my leaving - but he always does. This morning he has been very silly and I've had to give him many reminders in the past hour. (Not the best way to start a morning, I will confess...)
The A-man is fine about my going away for the weekend, but felt very assured that he had all of the contact information he needs - just in case.
We all went to see the R-man's house last night. It is quite nice, and they look like they have been living there forever. We didn't get to visit as long as I would have liked, but that was my fault because my hairdresser took a lot longer getting rid of the grey...
On my way out the door, R-man's girlfriend (I'm going to call her LF) handed me a couple of gift bags - my 'birthweek' gifts from Cuz. (!!) Love the burning candles and firetruck sounds, btw...
This morning is day one - very nice candle holder.
For the past couple of years, Cuz and I have celebrated our birth weeks. One present a day for the week building up to your actual birthday, with the main gift being #7. We usually go for cute, silly things for the other 6 days, but it just helps build the excitement of having a 'special' day. (I am very much of the belief that a birthday should be celebrated regardless of the age of the person! :o) )
And... I am off!
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