Well, the silent treatment has ended, and I have become S’s confidant once again.
When we got home last night, S was sitting in the living room waiting for the A-man and I. He was very quick to tell me about the homework that he had, and even pulled out the information he needed right away to finish it as quickly as he could.
After finding the information he needed in the flyers (it was a math-type assignment where they had to use 'real prices') I was amazed to see him start to straighten up the newspaper as soon as I reminded him. I told S that he didn't have to do it right away, but to make sure that he did it before too long.
"Oh no, that's okay. I like to do things right away when I'm upset," he explained to me. When I asked him what he was upset about, S pulled two notes from his pocket.
The first was a note from Lil'A explaining that she "didn't want him to love her anymore because she had found someone else to love." It went on further to tell him that she knew of a girl that liked S and she thought maybe he should consider loving her. The second note was from a friend of Lil'A's saying that it really upset her to see S watching Lil'A all "lovey dovey" and maybe he should find someone else.
Oh - to be so young and naive as a 14 year old girl. (See, apparently feeling can be turned on and off at whim...)
S was more than chatty about this turn of events. He even told me that he knew this was coming - he has apparently known for a couple of days. Hmm... wasn't it a couple of days ago that he was all grouchy and snarly at home? He said that wasn't why he'd been so rude the other day, but it all makes sense now.
S was more than happy to help me get supper prepared, and he chatted with me for the entire time. At one point I had to ask the A-man to leave the kitchen because he came in, asked what we were talking about, and then interjected with a comment he thought he had heard S say. It was not in any way similar to the discussion S and I were having, so I suggested that perhaps the A-man allow S and I a little bit of privacy. I think he was just grateful to not have to help with supper, to be honest.
The boys and I had a lovely dinner. We all chatted about our days, about what had been happening here, there and everywhere, and after supper, both boys were very quick to get started on their after dinner chores. I had a telephone conference at 7.30, and they were both quiet while I was on that call.
After I got off the phone, I thanked S for all of his help and asked to review his completed homework. After I gave it the once over, I told him that he could watch one television show since he had been so helpful. I told him that he was not getting out of the 'grounding' but that I would dole out time limits as I felt was appropriate. He was very thankful for the chance to watch TV, and I even got a bit of a shoulder squeeze/hug on his way past me.
ARGH!! Teenagers! One minute you are the WORST person ever, and the next, they totally love you. I know I was a moody teen, but holy!
~~~
On a different front, my dear friend ‘Nee’ has been going through some major issues with her youngest son. J is 13, and although she has always had some concerns about him – many reasons for these – a lot of these concerns have come to a head back at the end of October.
J has started cutting. She discovered a number of cuts along his upper arm, all in various stages on healing. When she asked him about it, I guess he felt it was time to come clean with a number of things. Nee and her ex have shared custody of their two sons – they live two weeks with Nee and two weeks with Hubs. Apparently during the two weeks with Hubs, J has taken to smoking cigarettes, drinking, and using pot.
It’s a very long story – and not my story to tell – but she has been in touch with me off and on over the past few weeks because she was very much aware of the mental health issues we lived through with S, and she knew that I would be a source of both support and knowledge about how she should proceed.
I had lunch with Nee today and found out the latest with J. He was actually admitted to the hospital last weekend. Her eldest son phoned her with a concern that he thought J had cut a pentagram into his thigh. (It was their time at their Dad’s) Nee went to Hubs house and asked J to take down his pants so that she could confirm if this was true.
It was true, but he had actually used something to burn the pentagram into his thigh. At this point she informed both J and Hubs that she was taking him to the hospital because she knew something needed to be done. She had been in touch with their doctor regarding the cutting and the substance use, etc., so this was something she had been advised to watch for, etc.
The hospital admitted J and kept him for observation for two days. He is now taking some medication to help with the obvious depression, and due to the hospital stay, he has been short-listed for many services that would normally take the better part of a year to receive.
My heart is breaking for both my friend and her son.
Mental health issues have been in Hubs family for many years, but until days after his son was admitted to the hospital, he was not willing to acknowledge any problems or concerns with J. It would appear that he is starting to come around and actually DO something other than blame Nee for everything that has happened ‘wrong’ in their marriage. I am hoping he will also use this time to perhaps examine the reasons for her leaving him in the first place.
So, yet again, children’s mental health issues have reared its ugly head in my world. It is so sad to think that it often needs to go to major extremes before these kids can get the help and support they need.
Nee has taken a leave of absence from her job, and will be providing constant supervision to J, and it would appear that (finally) Hubs will be doing the same during his time with the boys, and he has acknowledged that sometimes she may be the better person to be with the kids, even if it’s “his week.”
I gave her a huge hug, and told her that I am here for her, whenever she needs me. She was there for me when I needed her, and I will be more than happy to provide that same necessary ear. I told her that I won’t offer advice – I will just be a sounding board.
She is going to need it for a while. I’m just so grateful that she became aware of this situation before it became really bad, and that she has been successful in getting the supports in place very quickly.
Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anxiety. Show all posts
Friday, November 13, 2009
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Letter to the teacher
Here is the letter S will be giving to his teachers when he starts school next week:
Dear Teacher,
I would like to provide you with some information one of your Grade 9 students this year – S.
I know you will be receiving a copy of his IEP within the next few weeks, but I thought it would be best to start the year with all of details about his special educational requirements fully explained, and to also let you know that I would appreciate being kept aware of his progress in your classroom via email. Above, you will notice I’ve provided my various contact numbers and home email address for your records.
S has been diagnosed with a number of learning disabilities, in addition to having ADHD, Aspergers and a Generalized Anxiety Disorder. He has had a board-provided laptop for two years, and has been well-trained on all of the programs installed on his system. S and I also participated in a Board-sanctioned training program over the summer and we are both prepared to ensure a positive and successful transition to his next level of education.
While attending the training program in August, the Superintendent of Special Education assured the parents that most of the text books utilized in our schools have already been scanned and are available through the Board office. I would appreciate it if you could let me know the details of any textbooks that will be used in your classroom so that I can ensure he has what is required already on his system. If you can email with this information sometime this week, I will confirm the data is on his system over the weekend.
In addition to having his textbook available electronically, I wanted to advise you that S does have a graphomotor disability, and should not be requested to copy detailed notes from the board. His IEP will indicate that this information be provided to him already prepared, so that he can make notations as the work is being discussed in class. (If possible, it would ideal if the information could be provided in advance to allow him the opportunity to scan it into the laptop prior to class and make electronic notations, but I do realize this won’t always be realistic.)
S will utilize Kurzweil (a text-to-voice software program) to assist him with the reading of the text, and Dragon Naturally Speaking (DNS) will be used for the inputting of his information. DNS is a text-to-voice program that allows him to share his thoughts and ideas freely – he will use this program to speak into the computer, get his thought into print, and will then require some time to edit the information into suitable context.
For the past three years, S has had EA support, and I have been advised this will continue during his time at your school. I’m not fully understanding of how EA support works within the high school environment and ask for your patience while both S and I adjust to this.
Now, a little bit about his Aspergers. In January 2008, S underwent some extensive medical testing, including an fMRI at a hospital. The fMRI is a functional MRI that actually monitored and assessed his brainwave function. In a nutshell – and using a few technical terms as possible! - the results of this test indicated that S needs information to be provided repetitively for it to become rote - his brain simply does not encode novel tasks. He processes everything in a literal manner, and is not able to conceptualize how his present actions can/will affect his future. He lacks imagination and will not be able to visual/conceptualize new ideas. He can neither read nor understand facial expressions/voice tones, and often will not look you in the eye when speaking. He will not do this to be rude – he simply is unable to do this, so please don’t force this issue as he can become agitated.
With respect to the ADHD and Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), S has been fortunate to have been experiencing fewer and fewer symptoms of the GAD, and hopefully won’t have any problems at highschool. He has been known to become very anxious during transitional periods or during times that are out of the norm (such as leaving ‘normal class’ to go to the gym for an assembly.) Past experience has shown that when advised of schedule adjustments in advance, he tends to cope better. S experiences typical ADHD behaviour – sometimes he will need gentle reminders to remain on task (without drawing attention to him) and he does not have innate organizational abilities. Due to his short working memory, he will require reminders about recording homework assignments and assistance in determining the best plan of attack for large projects/assignments. Again, this is where it would be helpful to send me an email with homework details so that I can ensure he stays on task.
Despite the conditions I have explained to you, S is a very happy teen that truly wants to do well, and is very willing to please others. Nothing makes him happier than to be of assistance in some way, shape or form. He is very musically inclined, loves to do magic tricks, and is happy to tell you the latest joke he has heard. He has an average-to-above-average IQ, and has the ability to do well in school if provided the necessary accommodations. S has been the target of bullies in the past, and as such, tends to want to ensure all rules are clearly explained and treatment for all is ‘fair.’
I have always been very involved in my son’s education, and would like to see this continue at high school. I realize that my child is not perfect, and I also recognize that S’s perception is often very different than the perception of others. I am willing to take the time to ‘peel the layers’ to get to the heart of any/all issues with him, and it is my sincere hope that together we will have an opportunity to ensure his success. Once the school year has begun, I would appreciate the opportunity to meet with you and further discuss the information I’ve included in this letter. I apologize for the length of this letter, however I feel it is very important to start the new year/new school with as much information shared as possible.
I will contact the school within the next two weeks to set up a meeting if I don’t hear from you prior.
Thank you for your time – I look forward to meeting you soon.
Dear Teacher,
I would like to provide you with some information one of your Grade 9 students this year – S.
I know you will be receiving a copy of his IEP within the next few weeks, but I thought it would be best to start the year with all of details about his special educational requirements fully explained, and to also let you know that I would appreciate being kept aware of his progress in your classroom via email. Above, you will notice I’ve provided my various contact numbers and home email address for your records.
S has been diagnosed with a number of learning disabilities, in addition to having ADHD, Aspergers and a Generalized Anxiety Disorder. He has had a board-provided laptop for two years, and has been well-trained on all of the programs installed on his system. S and I also participated in a Board-sanctioned training program over the summer and we are both prepared to ensure a positive and successful transition to his next level of education.
While attending the training program in August, the Superintendent of Special Education assured the parents that most of the text books utilized in our schools have already been scanned and are available through the Board office. I would appreciate it if you could let me know the details of any textbooks that will be used in your classroom so that I can ensure he has what is required already on his system. If you can email with this information sometime this week, I will confirm the data is on his system over the weekend.
In addition to having his textbook available electronically, I wanted to advise you that S does have a graphomotor disability, and should not be requested to copy detailed notes from the board. His IEP will indicate that this information be provided to him already prepared, so that he can make notations as the work is being discussed in class. (If possible, it would ideal if the information could be provided in advance to allow him the opportunity to scan it into the laptop prior to class and make electronic notations, but I do realize this won’t always be realistic.)
S will utilize Kurzweil (a text-to-voice software program) to assist him with the reading of the text, and Dragon Naturally Speaking (DNS) will be used for the inputting of his information. DNS is a text-to-voice program that allows him to share his thoughts and ideas freely – he will use this program to speak into the computer, get his thought into print, and will then require some time to edit the information into suitable context.
For the past three years, S has had EA support, and I have been advised this will continue during his time at your school. I’m not fully understanding of how EA support works within the high school environment and ask for your patience while both S and I adjust to this.
Now, a little bit about his Aspergers. In January 2008, S underwent some extensive medical testing, including an fMRI at a hospital. The fMRI is a functional MRI that actually monitored and assessed his brainwave function. In a nutshell – and using a few technical terms as possible! - the results of this test indicated that S needs information to be provided repetitively for it to become rote - his brain simply does not encode novel tasks. He processes everything in a literal manner, and is not able to conceptualize how his present actions can/will affect his future. He lacks imagination and will not be able to visual/conceptualize new ideas. He can neither read nor understand facial expressions/voice tones, and often will not look you in the eye when speaking. He will not do this to be rude – he simply is unable to do this, so please don’t force this issue as he can become agitated.
With respect to the ADHD and Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), S has been fortunate to have been experiencing fewer and fewer symptoms of the GAD, and hopefully won’t have any problems at highschool. He has been known to become very anxious during transitional periods or during times that are out of the norm (such as leaving ‘normal class’ to go to the gym for an assembly.) Past experience has shown that when advised of schedule adjustments in advance, he tends to cope better. S experiences typical ADHD behaviour – sometimes he will need gentle reminders to remain on task (without drawing attention to him) and he does not have innate organizational abilities. Due to his short working memory, he will require reminders about recording homework assignments and assistance in determining the best plan of attack for large projects/assignments. Again, this is where it would be helpful to send me an email with homework details so that I can ensure he stays on task.
Despite the conditions I have explained to you, S is a very happy teen that truly wants to do well, and is very willing to please others. Nothing makes him happier than to be of assistance in some way, shape or form. He is very musically inclined, loves to do magic tricks, and is happy to tell you the latest joke he has heard. He has an average-to-above-average IQ, and has the ability to do well in school if provided the necessary accommodations. S has been the target of bullies in the past, and as such, tends to want to ensure all rules are clearly explained and treatment for all is ‘fair.’
I have always been very involved in my son’s education, and would like to see this continue at high school. I realize that my child is not perfect, and I also recognize that S’s perception is often very different than the perception of others. I am willing to take the time to ‘peel the layers’ to get to the heart of any/all issues with him, and it is my sincere hope that together we will have an opportunity to ensure his success. Once the school year has begun, I would appreciate the opportunity to meet with you and further discuss the information I’ve included in this letter. I apologize for the length of this letter, however I feel it is very important to start the new year/new school with as much information shared as possible.
I will contact the school within the next two weeks to set up a meeting if I don’t hear from you prior.
Thank you for your time – I look forward to meeting you soon.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
New school year getting close
I think it was a very good thing to have the opportunity to go and see the school yesterday.
S will have the following classes this term – Music, Science, Learning Strategies and Geography. He will have the same teacher for both Music and Geography, and he knows his Learning Strategies teacher from a supply stint last year, and seemed really happy to know that he will be working with her again.
The Science teacher is the same one that the A-man had last year… I did not care for this man, but I will be sure to prepare a “letter of introduction” for him. I’m also prepared to ensure he will not bully S in the same manner he got away with for the A-man. (I still feel really bad that I didn’t believe the A-man when he complained about this teacher…) There will be no marks deducted for wrinkled or ripped pages this year, I tell ya.
Also while at the school, S learned that he would have a few of his favourite people in his classes, so that will be nice too. He will have music with one cousin, learning strategies with another, and geography with his ‘girl friend’. She originally was going to have 3 out of 4 classes with him, but when she switched out of music to drama, it adjusted all of her schedule. Still, it will be nice for him to have the comfort of knowing at least one face when he walks into each class room next week.
While we were at the school, I inquired about his laptop system and his EA support. S’s locker is very close to the resource room, so he was advised to go into that room upon arriving at school and meet the various EA’s that he will be working with. The laptop actually arrived while we were taking the school tour, so at least we know that is done. Now I just have to make sure the text books have already been put into the text to voice program (Kurzweil) that he uses. Otherwise I will have to find out the method for getting the necessary pages scanned in while we wait for the books to be uploaded from the Board office.
Tonight I will be picking up S’s “friend” on my way home from work. They have made a ‘date’ to hang out at the mall and do some back to school shopping together. He was convinced that the universe was against him on Friday when she had called to invite him for Sunday. This is my way of making up the fact that we went to the cottage for the weekend.
The A-man called R (his ‘friend’) to see if she could come – of course she can’t – so my niece is going to come and hang out with the A-man. I think this will be good as she’s going through a rough time since her boyfriend broke up with her on the weekend, and the A-man will be able to help her see things a bit more clearly, I’m sure. (They were far too involved for people that are only 14 and 15 anyway, I think.)
So, I will bring my book and probably park my butt on a bench, sipping tea, and waiting for the teenagers to do their thing. It will be a great way to get in some serious people-watching anyway. I’m also going to drop off some eggs to the R-man while in the city.
Last night S and I went through all of his school uniform stuff, and I ended up going through the rest of his clothes since our cleaning lady dropped off a bag of stuff to us. He now has 7 pairs of jeans in the drawer for use now, plus about the same number hanging in the closet for when he grows. I am in the clear for clothing for this child for quite some time. Uniform stuff he is set for a long time too. The A-man is a different story, but at least he will be able to have enough for getting through the first week when I will go in a pick up some new pants and shirts for him.
I am planning on taking Friday off work (boss doesn’t know that yet) and hoping to maybe go over and spend some time with Cuz. I’m not sure if she will be at her summer location, but I will give her a call on Thursday to see what she will be up to. I’ve got my birth week gift from her at the cottage, and I can’t believe that I will begin opening on Saturday!
Not sure what type of school supplies we will need to get, but again, I’m pretty sure we will be able to cope for the first week at least!
S will have the following classes this term – Music, Science, Learning Strategies and Geography. He will have the same teacher for both Music and Geography, and he knows his Learning Strategies teacher from a supply stint last year, and seemed really happy to know that he will be working with her again.
The Science teacher is the same one that the A-man had last year… I did not care for this man, but I will be sure to prepare a “letter of introduction” for him. I’m also prepared to ensure he will not bully S in the same manner he got away with for the A-man. (I still feel really bad that I didn’t believe the A-man when he complained about this teacher…) There will be no marks deducted for wrinkled or ripped pages this year, I tell ya.
Also while at the school, S learned that he would have a few of his favourite people in his classes, so that will be nice too. He will have music with one cousin, learning strategies with another, and geography with his ‘girl friend’. She originally was going to have 3 out of 4 classes with him, but when she switched out of music to drama, it adjusted all of her schedule. Still, it will be nice for him to have the comfort of knowing at least one face when he walks into each class room next week.
While we were at the school, I inquired about his laptop system and his EA support. S’s locker is very close to the resource room, so he was advised to go into that room upon arriving at school and meet the various EA’s that he will be working with. The laptop actually arrived while we were taking the school tour, so at least we know that is done. Now I just have to make sure the text books have already been put into the text to voice program (Kurzweil) that he uses. Otherwise I will have to find out the method for getting the necessary pages scanned in while we wait for the books to be uploaded from the Board office.
Tonight I will be picking up S’s “friend” on my way home from work. They have made a ‘date’ to hang out at the mall and do some back to school shopping together. He was convinced that the universe was against him on Friday when she had called to invite him for Sunday. This is my way of making up the fact that we went to the cottage for the weekend.
The A-man called R (his ‘friend’) to see if she could come – of course she can’t – so my niece is going to come and hang out with the A-man. I think this will be good as she’s going through a rough time since her boyfriend broke up with her on the weekend, and the A-man will be able to help her see things a bit more clearly, I’m sure. (They were far too involved for people that are only 14 and 15 anyway, I think.)
So, I will bring my book and probably park my butt on a bench, sipping tea, and waiting for the teenagers to do their thing. It will be a great way to get in some serious people-watching anyway. I’m also going to drop off some eggs to the R-man while in the city.
Last night S and I went through all of his school uniform stuff, and I ended up going through the rest of his clothes since our cleaning lady dropped off a bag of stuff to us. He now has 7 pairs of jeans in the drawer for use now, plus about the same number hanging in the closet for when he grows. I am in the clear for clothing for this child for quite some time. Uniform stuff he is set for a long time too. The A-man is a different story, but at least he will be able to have enough for getting through the first week when I will go in a pick up some new pants and shirts for him.
I am planning on taking Friday off work (boss doesn’t know that yet) and hoping to maybe go over and spend some time with Cuz. I’m not sure if she will be at her summer location, but I will give her a call on Thursday to see what she will be up to. I’ve got my birth week gift from her at the cottage, and I can’t believe that I will begin opening on Saturday!
Not sure what type of school supplies we will need to get, but again, I’m pretty sure we will be able to cope for the first week at least!
Friday, August 28, 2009
School starting soon
It's almost the weekend...
Although I am looking forward to a couple of down days, I'm starting to think that I really need some 'down weeks'! (lol)
I guess this, too, shall pass.
I called the school yesterday to get some information about S's specialized bussing. Turns out he will be getting on the bus almost a half hour earlier than he is used to, and about 10 minutes before the A-man's bus comes to get him each day. He's not sold on this whole "short bus" concept, but last night when I asked him if he thought he could manage on the 'regular' bus, he didn't really have a reply for me. I guess I will just have to monitor the situation, and see how he is coping further in to the school year before I look at making some changes in his transportation.
It could be that he's past the issues he'd experienced years ago, but it would probably be something we would have to move into in transitional stages. I'm sure age and maturity will play a large part in all of it - for both S and the other students on the bus, actually.
I would love for him to have the ability to ride the 'regular' bus again, but I just don't want to face all of the turmoil again, and I am thinking the negative stigma to an outburst on a high school bus would be far worse than that of elementary school. Maybe not...
Feeling very unsure about all of this - can you tell?
On Monday we have the official tour of the school - finding the classrooms, getting the locker - that sort of thing. The A-man is really looking forward to being our official tour guide at the school. I think he is quite excited that S is going to finally have the opportunity to get away from the other school.
We are going to the cottage tonight - I left a number of tasks for the boys to complete today and advised them that the sooner they get these done, the sooner we will be able to head out. I am seriously hoping that S helps with the tasks - the A-man always seems to end up having to do his share and then some.
~~~
Haven't had any response from the resumes I've sent out, but I will continue to look and consider. Boss and I are going to be interviewing a young lady on Tuesday morning to replace my assistant, but I'm still not sure if she will be required on a full time basis or not.
Oh, the fun just never ends...
Although I am looking forward to a couple of down days, I'm starting to think that I really need some 'down weeks'! (lol)
I guess this, too, shall pass.
I called the school yesterday to get some information about S's specialized bussing. Turns out he will be getting on the bus almost a half hour earlier than he is used to, and about 10 minutes before the A-man's bus comes to get him each day. He's not sold on this whole "short bus" concept, but last night when I asked him if he thought he could manage on the 'regular' bus, he didn't really have a reply for me. I guess I will just have to monitor the situation, and see how he is coping further in to the school year before I look at making some changes in his transportation.
It could be that he's past the issues he'd experienced years ago, but it would probably be something we would have to move into in transitional stages. I'm sure age and maturity will play a large part in all of it - for both S and the other students on the bus, actually.
I would love for him to have the ability to ride the 'regular' bus again, but I just don't want to face all of the turmoil again, and I am thinking the negative stigma to an outburst on a high school bus would be far worse than that of elementary school. Maybe not...
Feeling very unsure about all of this - can you tell?
On Monday we have the official tour of the school - finding the classrooms, getting the locker - that sort of thing. The A-man is really looking forward to being our official tour guide at the school. I think he is quite excited that S is going to finally have the opportunity to get away from the other school.
We are going to the cottage tonight - I left a number of tasks for the boys to complete today and advised them that the sooner they get these done, the sooner we will be able to head out. I am seriously hoping that S helps with the tasks - the A-man always seems to end up having to do his share and then some.
~~~
Haven't had any response from the resumes I've sent out, but I will continue to look and consider. Boss and I are going to be interviewing a young lady on Tuesday morning to replace my assistant, but I'm still not sure if she will be required on a full time basis or not.
Oh, the fun just never ends...
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Continuing saga
How has a week passed since I did my last post? I swear the clock is on "fast forward" right now.
Okay - back to the S story.
We were at the Thursday before March Break and he had his Graduation pictures taken that day. He had his new shirt and tie for the photos and was feeling pretty good about looking so grown up. I could tell he was excited.
Anyway, at the end of the school day, I get a phone call about him being agitated about something. He was so agitated that they didn't feel it was wise for him to take the bus home. I went and got him and when I got there, I had a brief chat with the EA.
She told me that she has noticed he seems to be quite anxious about the start of high school next year, and she was wondering if as the days go by, he is just starting to express this anxiety by acting out.
Hmm.
As S and I drove home that afternoon, I told him that I thought he should just not bother going to school the next day. The whole day is pretty much a write-off; both kids and teachers are already in 'holiday' mode, so what was the point? He told me that he wanted to go because it was 'twin day' and he and his friend had made plans to be twins with their outfits. I told him it was up to him, but if he did go, I would expect him to have a good day. Period.
That night we went to the Y and did our normal evening stuff, and about half an hour before bed, S asked me if my offer was still open. I told him yes. He decided that he would stay home.
Everything went pretty good through the March break. S was invited over to his friends for a sleep over one night - his friend also has Aspergers - and that was the afternoon Hubby and friend went out on the ATV. The A-man joined them in the afternoon, but I guess he didn't quite like the "getting stuck and pulling out using the whinch" part of Spring riding; he opted to stay home when they went out the second time that day.
Another day Hubby took the boys to the Sportsman show. It sounds like they all had a good time. On the weekend, S had his friend over to our house for a sleep over.
So far - touch wood - this week has been fine for S. I think he has resigned himself to the fact that I WILL be going on the end of year trip, but he really wants to be able to share a room with a friend. I'm not sure the 'friend' feels the same way anymore.
I have been in touch with the SERT about the transition meeting for S. She basically has to explain S's history to the SERT at the highschool, and make recommendations for him - such as his special transportation and his EA.
Oh, you bet I will be at that meeting. My records binder isn't quite up to snuff, but at least I have a few weeks to get it whipped back in to shape. If they want him to continue on a successful path, these items are required.
And the battles continue.
On a different note, the A-man is going to stay in town tonight so that he can go to the dance at the high school. Next weekend is his 16th birthday. I'm thinking of getting a few of his friends to come over on Saturday for dinner and a wee party. It'll sort of be a 'reverse' surprise party - one where he is surprised by the people that are arriving! Hopefully I can pull it off.
Okay - back to the S story.
We were at the Thursday before March Break and he had his Graduation pictures taken that day. He had his new shirt and tie for the photos and was feeling pretty good about looking so grown up. I could tell he was excited.
Anyway, at the end of the school day, I get a phone call about him being agitated about something. He was so agitated that they didn't feel it was wise for him to take the bus home. I went and got him and when I got there, I had a brief chat with the EA.
She told me that she has noticed he seems to be quite anxious about the start of high school next year, and she was wondering if as the days go by, he is just starting to express this anxiety by acting out.
Hmm.
As S and I drove home that afternoon, I told him that I thought he should just not bother going to school the next day. The whole day is pretty much a write-off; both kids and teachers are already in 'holiday' mode, so what was the point? He told me that he wanted to go because it was 'twin day' and he and his friend had made plans to be twins with their outfits. I told him it was up to him, but if he did go, I would expect him to have a good day. Period.
That night we went to the Y and did our normal evening stuff, and about half an hour before bed, S asked me if my offer was still open. I told him yes. He decided that he would stay home.
Everything went pretty good through the March break. S was invited over to his friends for a sleep over one night - his friend also has Aspergers - and that was the afternoon Hubby and friend went out on the ATV. The A-man joined them in the afternoon, but I guess he didn't quite like the "getting stuck and pulling out using the whinch" part of Spring riding; he opted to stay home when they went out the second time that day.
Another day Hubby took the boys to the Sportsman show. It sounds like they all had a good time. On the weekend, S had his friend over to our house for a sleep over.
So far - touch wood - this week has been fine for S. I think he has resigned himself to the fact that I WILL be going on the end of year trip, but he really wants to be able to share a room with a friend. I'm not sure the 'friend' feels the same way anymore.
I have been in touch with the SERT about the transition meeting for S. She basically has to explain S's history to the SERT at the highschool, and make recommendations for him - such as his special transportation and his EA.
Oh, you bet I will be at that meeting. My records binder isn't quite up to snuff, but at least I have a few weeks to get it whipped back in to shape. If they want him to continue on a successful path, these items are required.
And the battles continue.
On a different note, the A-man is going to stay in town tonight so that he can go to the dance at the high school. Next weekend is his 16th birthday. I'm thinking of getting a few of his friends to come over on Saturday for dinner and a wee party. It'll sort of be a 'reverse' surprise party - one where he is surprised by the people that are arriving! Hopefully I can pull it off.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Do they even have a clue?
Was quite surprised by a telephone call I received from S’s teacher yesterday. She was calling to tell me the balance of the amount *I* will have to pay for the Grade 8 trip this year.
We’ve made two installments for S’s trip, but when the first installment was due, I had called and talked to the principal about what I should be sending in for my portion. At that time, she had indicated to me that things were going really well with S and that I may not even have to take the trip with the class. The second date for installment payment came, and again, I wasn’t advised of needing to send my portion of the payment. Then, this.
I wish to heaven that this school would figure out what it wants to do.
I called the Principal last night to discuss this further. “Remember the conversation we had back in the Fall where you indicated that you didn’t think I would have to go?” She did, but I guess she had never expressed this to the teacher and/or EA. It’s fine – I will go on the trip if that is what I need to do to ensure that S can go, but I told the Principal that I was NOT comfortable with having S share a room with me.
If they want him to act like all the other kids in Grade 8, then they need to treat him the same. All of the students will be sharing rooms with other students – not their mother. It will be bad enough for him to have me along on the bus, never mind not getting to have the fun and excitement of sharing a room with a friend. (Mind you, he only has one friend in Grade 8 and I don’t know that this boy would want to share a room with S. They haven’t been as close the past couple of years… But still, he needs to be given that option, not be told “You are sharing a suite with your mother not a friend.”)
Talk about making the poor kid even MORE different than he already is.
I will hold fast to this one – I will not be sharing a room with him. I don’t want to be difficult, but if they are going to insist I’m there, they are going to have me in the background with as little involvement as needed. I’ll be there for S, but that’s it. I will even pay extra if that is what I need to do. Heck, the school should chip in some $$ towards it.
They have a staff member that is supposed to be assigned to S and she apparently can’t do her job on a daily basis never mind while on a field trip. Now I have to take three days out of my job, my home, husband and other child, plus pay $300 (or maybe even more) to have the honour of embarrassing the bejeesus out of my son, to boot. Nope – not gonna do it. They will put him in with his peers. Period.
I’m sure there will be many more discussions about this in the coming months. I’m so looking forward to it. (Yeah, right…and pigs fly!)
Truth be told, I am not upset about the trip – I like Ottawa and would appreciate the chance to revisit this city, but I just don’t like the waffling and see-sawing that is going on here. And I will not cause S any undue stress over it. Hopefully they will see my point early in the game.
We’ve made two installments for S’s trip, but when the first installment was due, I had called and talked to the principal about what I should be sending in for my portion. At that time, she had indicated to me that things were going really well with S and that I may not even have to take the trip with the class. The second date for installment payment came, and again, I wasn’t advised of needing to send my portion of the payment. Then, this.
I wish to heaven that this school would figure out what it wants to do.
I called the Principal last night to discuss this further. “Remember the conversation we had back in the Fall where you indicated that you didn’t think I would have to go?” She did, but I guess she had never expressed this to the teacher and/or EA. It’s fine – I will go on the trip if that is what I need to do to ensure that S can go, but I told the Principal that I was NOT comfortable with having S share a room with me.
If they want him to act like all the other kids in Grade 8, then they need to treat him the same. All of the students will be sharing rooms with other students – not their mother. It will be bad enough for him to have me along on the bus, never mind not getting to have the fun and excitement of sharing a room with a friend. (Mind you, he only has one friend in Grade 8 and I don’t know that this boy would want to share a room with S. They haven’t been as close the past couple of years… But still, he needs to be given that option, not be told “You are sharing a suite with your mother not a friend.”)
Talk about making the poor kid even MORE different than he already is.
I will hold fast to this one – I will not be sharing a room with him. I don’t want to be difficult, but if they are going to insist I’m there, they are going to have me in the background with as little involvement as needed. I’ll be there for S, but that’s it. I will even pay extra if that is what I need to do. Heck, the school should chip in some $$ towards it.
They have a staff member that is supposed to be assigned to S and she apparently can’t do her job on a daily basis never mind while on a field trip. Now I have to take three days out of my job, my home, husband and other child, plus pay $300 (or maybe even more) to have the honour of embarrassing the bejeesus out of my son, to boot. Nope – not gonna do it. They will put him in with his peers. Period.
I’m sure there will be many more discussions about this in the coming months. I’m so looking forward to it. (Yeah, right…and pigs fly!)
Truth be told, I am not upset about the trip – I like Ottawa and would appreciate the chance to revisit this city, but I just don’t like the waffling and see-sawing that is going on here. And I will not cause S any undue stress over it. Hopefully they will see my point early in the game.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Back at it
I find it incredible how two weeks of each year can have such a build up, and then in the blink of an eye, be done. Just a memory.
So went another Christmas. I will admit, I really liked not being the person making the traditional dinner this year. My Christmas morning/day was just so relaxed. Now, don't get me wrong - I love doing the dinner, etc., but since I've done it for the past five years or so, it was nice to NOT be doing it, too.
Funny how we like to have it both ways, huh?
So, the New Year has arrived. Ours was brought in with a few friends at a house party. It was quiet, but still a pleasant time. The most excitement occured when our pre-scheduled taxi arrived, then promptly pulled away from the house, thereby leaving us stranded. We ended up getting a friend's daughter to take us home, and she benefited by us hiding the taxi money in the car for her. Win/win situation.
Yes, I did call the taxi company to complain, but I doubt anything will come of it. No matter - jut won't ever use them again. Ever.
The A-man has an ISU for his History class. He's known about this assignment for a number of weeks now, but has done nothing on it. He told me that he would work with his partner over the holidays. It drives me nuts that they have partners for ISU's. I have no problem with this particular partner - it's actually Jazzy's brother - and I know he will do his share of the project, but the idea is that it is an INDIVIDUAL study unit. I N D I V I D U A L. That is the key word there, people.
Anyway, over the beginning of the holiday, I knew that Jazzy's family was away on a ski holiday. Then it was Christmas, and we were away for 5 days. Next thing we know, it is the New Year, and the A-man and Jazzy's brother have done nothing on the project. I ask the A-man for the detailed sheet on the project. He claimed they weren't given one.
Yeah, right. Because a teacher is going to assign a project - a major project - and not give out detailed information about what is needed, etc. You buy that, right?
What, you don't?!?!?
I didn't either.
After having the A-man call a couple of classmates - which was impossible because he claims he knows no one in the class - there seemed to be no information available. On New Years day, when we went to get our vehicle from the house party location, I happened to ask their son if he had a sheet. The day previous when the A-man had called, this boy claimed he didn't know if anything had been given out. It's amazing how a memory can suddenly be triggered when the same question is asked by a parent, in front of another parent.
When I came home and gave the A-man this sheet he had SWORN he didn't receive, I did feel somewhat vindicated, I will admit it. Hey, you gotta take the small pleasures where you can. ;o)
The next day, the A-man and Jazzy's brother spent quite a bit of time working on the project together. Both of them claimed a due date had not been given, but Jazzy's parents are somewhat like me in their homework approach, and were both 'with me' when I said I didn't want to see this done in the last possible moments. Turns out they have to turn in the project in a week and a half, meaning they do have time, but Jazzy's brother is a ski instructor and works every weekend. At least now they have split up the work and each can be responsible for certain portions of the project. This project is worth 15% of their final History mark.
Maybe someday the A-man will realize I am not just being mean. Hopefully.
On a positive note, the A-man received a very good mark on his Tourism ISU - 95% - and was quite pleased with that, for obvious reasons. Again, I road him a bit on that one, but HE was pleased with that outcome; maybe I'll give him a reminder about that.
~~
I called S's principal yesterday afternoon about the in-school suspension he had received prior to the holidays. My main reason for calling was because he had been in the school all day and not given an opportunity to go out and run around a bit. Turns out S didn't mention to me that he was given outside time; it just wasn't at the same time as the rest of the school.
The Principal explained to me that she wanted to use that time to talk one-on-one with S, to explain a few things to him, and simply to get to know him - and how his mind works - better. She was very surprsied to learn that he was agitated after the day, because she said he was just fine throughout the entire day in school. In fact, she told me that he was very helpful in completing a number of tasks that needed to be done before the start of the Christmas break.
We ended the conversation with the agreement that Principal was going to talk to S today about how he felt after the in-school suspension, and explain to him that if he exudes a calm exterior and then blows up at home, she can’t do anything to help him at the time. She explained to me that she was going to work on encouraging S to ‘use his words’, etc.
It seems to strange to think that we have to talk like this to a 13 year old, but I guess that is all part and parcel with the Auspergers. I need to do more reading/research on Auspergers.
So, all in all, life is back to ‘normal’ again. School is back in, routine has been established once again, and my work-life is about to enter the crazy phase from now until the middle of March. February will once again be a time of away-from-home-more-than-at-home, but at least it’s not the first time we’ve gone through this, and I will be able to breathe a little easier this year knowing that both boys did so well with it all last year.
So went another Christmas. I will admit, I really liked not being the person making the traditional dinner this year. My Christmas morning/day was just so relaxed. Now, don't get me wrong - I love doing the dinner, etc., but since I've done it for the past five years or so, it was nice to NOT be doing it, too.
Funny how we like to have it both ways, huh?
So, the New Year has arrived. Ours was brought in with a few friends at a house party. It was quiet, but still a pleasant time. The most excitement occured when our pre-scheduled taxi arrived, then promptly pulled away from the house, thereby leaving us stranded. We ended up getting a friend's daughter to take us home, and she benefited by us hiding the taxi money in the car for her. Win/win situation.
Yes, I did call the taxi company to complain, but I doubt anything will come of it. No matter - jut won't ever use them again. Ever.
The A-man has an ISU for his History class. He's known about this assignment for a number of weeks now, but has done nothing on it. He told me that he would work with his partner over the holidays. It drives me nuts that they have partners for ISU's. I have no problem with this particular partner - it's actually Jazzy's brother - and I know he will do his share of the project, but the idea is that it is an INDIVIDUAL study unit. I N D I V I D U A L. That is the key word there, people.
Anyway, over the beginning of the holiday, I knew that Jazzy's family was away on a ski holiday. Then it was Christmas, and we were away for 5 days. Next thing we know, it is the New Year, and the A-man and Jazzy's brother have done nothing on the project. I ask the A-man for the detailed sheet on the project. He claimed they weren't given one.
Yeah, right. Because a teacher is going to assign a project - a major project - and not give out detailed information about what is needed, etc. You buy that, right?
What, you don't?!?!?
I didn't either.
After having the A-man call a couple of classmates - which was impossible because he claims he knows no one in the class - there seemed to be no information available. On New Years day, when we went to get our vehicle from the house party location, I happened to ask their son if he had a sheet. The day previous when the A-man had called, this boy claimed he didn't know if anything had been given out. It's amazing how a memory can suddenly be triggered when the same question is asked by a parent, in front of another parent.
When I came home and gave the A-man this sheet he had SWORN he didn't receive, I did feel somewhat vindicated, I will admit it. Hey, you gotta take the small pleasures where you can. ;o)
The next day, the A-man and Jazzy's brother spent quite a bit of time working on the project together. Both of them claimed a due date had not been given, but Jazzy's parents are somewhat like me in their homework approach, and were both 'with me' when I said I didn't want to see this done in the last possible moments. Turns out they have to turn in the project in a week and a half, meaning they do have time, but Jazzy's brother is a ski instructor and works every weekend. At least now they have split up the work and each can be responsible for certain portions of the project. This project is worth 15% of their final History mark.
Maybe someday the A-man will realize I am not just being mean. Hopefully.
On a positive note, the A-man received a very good mark on his Tourism ISU - 95% - and was quite pleased with that, for obvious reasons. Again, I road him a bit on that one, but HE was pleased with that outcome; maybe I'll give him a reminder about that.
~~
I called S's principal yesterday afternoon about the in-school suspension he had received prior to the holidays. My main reason for calling was because he had been in the school all day and not given an opportunity to go out and run around a bit. Turns out S didn't mention to me that he was given outside time; it just wasn't at the same time as the rest of the school.
The Principal explained to me that she wanted to use that time to talk one-on-one with S, to explain a few things to him, and simply to get to know him - and how his mind works - better. She was very surprsied to learn that he was agitated after the day, because she said he was just fine throughout the entire day in school. In fact, she told me that he was very helpful in completing a number of tasks that needed to be done before the start of the Christmas break.
We ended the conversation with the agreement that Principal was going to talk to S today about how he felt after the in-school suspension, and explain to him that if he exudes a calm exterior and then blows up at home, she can’t do anything to help him at the time. She explained to me that she was going to work on encouraging S to ‘use his words’, etc.
It seems to strange to think that we have to talk like this to a 13 year old, but I guess that is all part and parcel with the Auspergers. I need to do more reading/research on Auspergers.
So, all in all, life is back to ‘normal’ again. School is back in, routine has been established once again, and my work-life is about to enter the crazy phase from now until the middle of March. February will once again be a time of away-from-home-more-than-at-home, but at least it’s not the first time we’ve gone through this, and I will be able to breathe a little easier this year knowing that both boys did so well with it all last year.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
So relaxing
This is the first weekend since the end of September that I haven't had stuff going on. Now don't get me wrong - many of the past weekends have been a lot of fun. We got to see friends and family that we don't see very often, and we did some new things, but it just felt like we were go-go-go all the time.
Approaching this weekend, I declared "I don't care who invites us, or for what, we are doing NOTHING all weekend long."
That didn't last very long. I am so weak.
My mom's boss invited her to a Pampered Chef party this afternoon and Mom has asked me to join her. I thought, "Oh, it's a couple of hours on Saturday afternoon. I can do that. That is not a big deal."
Thursday, I got a text from a friend inviting us over for drinks on Friday night. Her hubby's birthday was on Thursday, so we knew the reason for the invite. It was a very enjoyable evening.
Also on Thursday, Jazzy's mom sent me a text asking if we could get together on Saturday night. I thought she had indicated they were coming to OUR house, and although I said that would be great, in my heart I was thinking, "Man, I don't wanna have to clean for company..." Found out last night that I mis-read the text. We are going to their house.
Whew... get to take my time on the housework this weekend!
Apparently Hubby didn't take my "We aren't doing anything" declaration to heart, either. He is off doing a computer job this morning, and is apparently helping a friend install a new window this afternoon.
*I* am sitting here, at 10:12 in the morning, still in my jammies, enjoying a leisurely coffee and quite happy to look (and feel) like a lazy slug for the next little while. Sloth may be a deadly sin, but oh, how great it can be sometimes!
The boys both have homework this weekend. The A-man was assigned an ISU (individual study unit) in his hospitality course a couple of weeks ago. They were told to work in groups of two, and given one full month to complete the assignment. To date, he and his partner have done nothing other than pick the country they are doing the assignment on. The A-man has requested he and his partner get together to work on this assignment a few times, but she has always been 'too busy' to do so. Yesterday she told him she 'might' have time after school on Monday, but she would let him know Monday morning if she was busy or not.
This is ridiculous. There is NO WAY he is going to do this entire assignment by himself and then have this girl take credit for his work. I know he hasn't done anything ON the assignment as of yet, but I am going to make sure that changes this weekend. Then, if she doesn't have time on Monday, I will be calling the teacher on Tuesday and letting her know that the A-man will be doing the ISU alone. It is called an "Individual" unit after all.
S didn't go to school yesterday - he went to a Volleyball tournament instead. I was a little hesitant about him missing a day of school for that, considering he doesn't actually play, but then when I thought about it and realized that all of the boys on the team are from his class, I also realized the class wouldn't really be doing a whole lot of 'new' stuff. He had a lot of fun at the tournament.
It's funny how an Asperger child can get so pumped about the slightest thing. He was so excited to tell me about every single person he saw that he knew at the highschool. I suddenly started hearing the names of every single student that had been in Grade 8 last year... and those that were in the same class as the A-man. I honestly don't think he realized where they all went when they left his school.
The other reason that I thought it would be good for him to go to the tournament was because it was being held at the school S will attend next year. Although he hasn't mentioned anything, I'm sure he is anxious about going to a new, larger school, and having spent some time there yesterday will have given him another opportunity to get more familiar with the school's layout and procedures. My hope it that this familiarity will help ease some of that transitional anxiety.
I think that was another factor in his excitement last night, too. He started to realize that the school really isn't as big as he was thinking.
Yesterday at work it came to light that I made a big boo boo when shipping some promotional items for my boss' conference in Spain. Apparently the items to shipped to Sapin, not Spain. I felt sick. I still feel sick when I think about it.
I called boss' partner to confess my error. He laughed and told me that he just wished his errors only cost the company $500, then suggested a stop-gag measure that will hopefully allow boss to have some of the materials by Monday. I was so relieved that he took it so well, but I still haven't talked to boss about what happened. I hope he takes it as well as his partner did.
On another work note, we are participating in a trade show next weekend. Actually working it for OUR business and for one of our clients. As I mentioned, Boss is in Spain so it will fall primarily on my shoulders to make sure all of the items we will require for the show - for both booths - make it to the city. No pressure here. I spent a lot of time yesterday coordinating the shipment/delivery of various marketing materials between the multiple areas they currently are, and making sure this, this and THAT, get picked up and delivered when and where we need it.
I'm sure it will all work out in the end; I've done this before, just never been the most experienced one in the office. My assistant and the sales rep will be there to help me, but both will be relying on me to make the final decisions on quantities, etc.
I will admit it - I'm a little freaked.
Okay... I've been a sloth for long enough now. It's almost 11... time to get motivated so do SOMETHING...
Approaching this weekend, I declared "I don't care who invites us, or for what, we are doing NOTHING all weekend long."
That didn't last very long. I am so weak.
My mom's boss invited her to a Pampered Chef party this afternoon and Mom has asked me to join her. I thought, "Oh, it's a couple of hours on Saturday afternoon. I can do that. That is not a big deal."
Thursday, I got a text from a friend inviting us over for drinks on Friday night. Her hubby's birthday was on Thursday, so we knew the reason for the invite. It was a very enjoyable evening.
Also on Thursday, Jazzy's mom sent me a text asking if we could get together on Saturday night. I thought she had indicated they were coming to OUR house, and although I said that would be great, in my heart I was thinking, "Man, I don't wanna have to clean for company..." Found out last night that I mis-read the text. We are going to their house.
Whew... get to take my time on the housework this weekend!
Apparently Hubby didn't take my "We aren't doing anything" declaration to heart, either. He is off doing a computer job this morning, and is apparently helping a friend install a new window this afternoon.
*I* am sitting here, at 10:12 in the morning, still in my jammies, enjoying a leisurely coffee and quite happy to look (and feel) like a lazy slug for the next little while. Sloth may be a deadly sin, but oh, how great it can be sometimes!
The boys both have homework this weekend. The A-man was assigned an ISU (individual study unit) in his hospitality course a couple of weeks ago. They were told to work in groups of two, and given one full month to complete the assignment. To date, he and his partner have done nothing other than pick the country they are doing the assignment on. The A-man has requested he and his partner get together to work on this assignment a few times, but she has always been 'too busy' to do so. Yesterday she told him she 'might' have time after school on Monday, but she would let him know Monday morning if she was busy or not.
This is ridiculous. There is NO WAY he is going to do this entire assignment by himself and then have this girl take credit for his work. I know he hasn't done anything ON the assignment as of yet, but I am going to make sure that changes this weekend. Then, if she doesn't have time on Monday, I will be calling the teacher on Tuesday and letting her know that the A-man will be doing the ISU alone. It is called an "Individual" unit after all.
S didn't go to school yesterday - he went to a Volleyball tournament instead. I was a little hesitant about him missing a day of school for that, considering he doesn't actually play, but then when I thought about it and realized that all of the boys on the team are from his class, I also realized the class wouldn't really be doing a whole lot of 'new' stuff. He had a lot of fun at the tournament.
It's funny how an Asperger child can get so pumped about the slightest thing. He was so excited to tell me about every single person he saw that he knew at the highschool. I suddenly started hearing the names of every single student that had been in Grade 8 last year... and those that were in the same class as the A-man. I honestly don't think he realized where they all went when they left his school.
The other reason that I thought it would be good for him to go to the tournament was because it was being held at the school S will attend next year. Although he hasn't mentioned anything, I'm sure he is anxious about going to a new, larger school, and having spent some time there yesterday will have given him another opportunity to get more familiar with the school's layout and procedures. My hope it that this familiarity will help ease some of that transitional anxiety.
I think that was another factor in his excitement last night, too. He started to realize that the school really isn't as big as he was thinking.
Yesterday at work it came to light that I made a big boo boo when shipping some promotional items for my boss' conference in Spain. Apparently the items to shipped to Sapin, not Spain. I felt sick. I still feel sick when I think about it.
I called boss' partner to confess my error. He laughed and told me that he just wished his errors only cost the company $500, then suggested a stop-gag measure that will hopefully allow boss to have some of the materials by Monday. I was so relieved that he took it so well, but I still haven't talked to boss about what happened. I hope he takes it as well as his partner did.
On another work note, we are participating in a trade show next weekend. Actually working it for OUR business and for one of our clients. As I mentioned, Boss is in Spain so it will fall primarily on my shoulders to make sure all of the items we will require for the show - for both booths - make it to the city. No pressure here. I spent a lot of time yesterday coordinating the shipment/delivery of various marketing materials between the multiple areas they currently are, and making sure this, this and THAT, get picked up and delivered when and where we need it.
I'm sure it will all work out in the end; I've done this before, just never been the most experienced one in the office. My assistant and the sales rep will be there to help me, but both will be relying on me to make the final decisions on quantities, etc.
I will admit it - I'm a little freaked.
Okay... I've been a sloth for long enough now. It's almost 11... time to get motivated so do SOMETHING...
Monday, October 20, 2008
Back to reality
Thursday's meeting with Boss went well. Pay structure that was offered was right within the amounts I was hoping it would be, plus there was an added bonus structure that I hadn't expected. Always nice.
I was also given a promotion with respect to the shows we run. Again, very cool; but not surprising. Flattering for sure, though.
Las Vegas was a total blast. I took so many pictures, and I can't wait to go through them on a bigger screen to find the best ones. I might even get Hubby to show me how to put together a little running video stream with the photos, subtitles and sound effects. (Hubby has the most interesting programs...)
Apparently S didn't do as well with my leaving as he had indicated at home; in S's agenda on Thursday afternoon was a note indicating that he had been acting up in school, and the EA asked if my trip was coming up. I couldn't answer because I was on my trip. He had a Science worksheet assigned on Thursday night and it was due today. S lied (or rather didn't offer) about having homework and didn't get it completed. I have had work on some it when he first got home and then he will finish the balance of it after supper tonight.
The A-man fared much better with respect to my going away, but he has never had the same concerns about my trips as S does.
Poor Hubby got a grouchy, tired wife coming in the door this afternoon. Our garbage and green bins didn't get picked up on Thursday as they were supposed to be, and when I pulled in to the driveway this afternoon and saw the bins and the garbage STILL sitting there, well, I was annoyed with both Hubby and the garbage man for not dealing with it. I'm pretty sure the person at the county office didn't like my phone call this afternoon. (It will be really bad if they don't pick it up tomorrow as they indicated they would.)
I did have a pretty good, solid sleep for the afternoon - red-eye flights are never good - and I'm happy to say that I think the boys will have a somewhat coherent, pleasant Mom for the evening. Dinner is baking in the oven and I'm going to just take it easy for the night.
I was also given a promotion with respect to the shows we run. Again, very cool; but not surprising. Flattering for sure, though.
Las Vegas was a total blast. I took so many pictures, and I can't wait to go through them on a bigger screen to find the best ones. I might even get Hubby to show me how to put together a little running video stream with the photos, subtitles and sound effects. (Hubby has the most interesting programs...)
Apparently S didn't do as well with my leaving as he had indicated at home; in S's agenda on Thursday afternoon was a note indicating that he had been acting up in school, and the EA asked if my trip was coming up. I couldn't answer because I was on my trip. He had a Science worksheet assigned on Thursday night and it was due today. S lied (or rather didn't offer) about having homework and didn't get it completed. I have had work on some it when he first got home and then he will finish the balance of it after supper tonight.
The A-man fared much better with respect to my going away, but he has never had the same concerns about my trips as S does.
Poor Hubby got a grouchy, tired wife coming in the door this afternoon. Our garbage and green bins didn't get picked up on Thursday as they were supposed to be, and when I pulled in to the driveway this afternoon and saw the bins and the garbage STILL sitting there, well, I was annoyed with both Hubby and the garbage man for not dealing with it. I'm pretty sure the person at the county office didn't like my phone call this afternoon. (It will be really bad if they don't pick it up tomorrow as they indicated they would.)
I did have a pretty good, solid sleep for the afternoon - red-eye flights are never good - and I'm happy to say that I think the boys will have a somewhat coherent, pleasant Mom for the evening. Dinner is baking in the oven and I'm going to just take it easy for the night.
Friday, September 5, 2008
Off again...
The vehicle is packed...with a few more things to add...and then I am off for another working weekend. This time is another outdoor event, but in the city. I won't be home until Monday afternoon, and I am a little nervous about it, I will admit.
S seems totally okay with my leaving - but he always does. This morning he has been very silly and I've had to give him many reminders in the past hour. (Not the best way to start a morning, I will confess...)
The A-man is fine about my going away for the weekend, but felt very assured that he had all of the contact information he needs - just in case.
We all went to see the R-man's house last night. It is quite nice, and they look like they have been living there forever. We didn't get to visit as long as I would have liked, but that was my fault because my hairdresser took a lot longer getting rid of the grey...
On my way out the door, R-man's girlfriend (I'm going to call her LF) handed me a couple of gift bags - my 'birthweek' gifts from Cuz. (!!) Love the burning candles and firetruck sounds, btw...
This morning is day one - very nice candle holder.
For the past couple of years, Cuz and I have celebrated our birth weeks. One present a day for the week building up to your actual birthday, with the main gift being #7. We usually go for cute, silly things for the other 6 days, but it just helps build the excitement of having a 'special' day. (I am very much of the belief that a birthday should be celebrated regardless of the age of the person! :o) )
And... I am off!
S seems totally okay with my leaving - but he always does. This morning he has been very silly and I've had to give him many reminders in the past hour. (Not the best way to start a morning, I will confess...)
The A-man is fine about my going away for the weekend, but felt very assured that he had all of the contact information he needs - just in case.
We all went to see the R-man's house last night. It is quite nice, and they look like they have been living there forever. We didn't get to visit as long as I would have liked, but that was my fault because my hairdresser took a lot longer getting rid of the grey...
On my way out the door, R-man's girlfriend (I'm going to call her LF) handed me a couple of gift bags - my 'birthweek' gifts from Cuz. (!!) Love the burning candles and firetruck sounds, btw...
This morning is day one - very nice candle holder.
For the past couple of years, Cuz and I have celebrated our birth weeks. One present a day for the week building up to your actual birthday, with the main gift being #7. We usually go for cute, silly things for the other 6 days, but it just helps build the excitement of having a 'special' day. (I am very much of the belief that a birthday should be celebrated regardless of the age of the person! :o) )
And... I am off!
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Let the games begin...
Hubby and I discovered over the weekend, it was not exactly the best of times to start the reduction of S's anxiety medication. We will try again in a couple of weeks - once the 'excitement' of beginning a new school year is over.
He didn't exactly have a major melt down yesterday, but it was gearing up to be a good one. Hubby was able to head it off at the pass.
I think both boys are quite excited about the start of a new school year, all things considered. Yes, S did have a bit of a melt down yesterday (as we knew he would) but he was up early this morning -before I woke him - and he's been talking non-stop since. "8th grade privilege" and "on the first day of school last year..."
The A-man's alarm went off at 6:30 (!!) and he didn't take too long to actually turn it off and start moaning about getting out of bed. He isn't a morning person - gets that from his Mom - therefore he realizes he needs time, at his pace, to do what he likes/needs to do in the morning. It has taken me a number of years to be able to relinquish control enough to allow him this time and space, but it really did work for him last year. I'm pretty sure his new-found maturity level also helped greatly with this.
Yesterday, when we were leaving the cottage, S told me that he and his brother and their three friends from the cottage had a big group hug as a way of saying good-bye to summer. Coping, learning and growing, I guess.
The start of another school year. I hope (and pray) it's finally a good one.
He didn't exactly have a major melt down yesterday, but it was gearing up to be a good one. Hubby was able to head it off at the pass.
I think both boys are quite excited about the start of a new school year, all things considered. Yes, S did have a bit of a melt down yesterday (as we knew he would) but he was up early this morning -before I woke him - and he's been talking non-stop since. "8th grade privilege" and "on the first day of school last year..."
The A-man's alarm went off at 6:30 (!!) and he didn't take too long to actually turn it off and start moaning about getting out of bed. He isn't a morning person - gets that from his Mom - therefore he realizes he needs time, at his pace, to do what he likes/needs to do in the morning. It has taken me a number of years to be able to relinquish control enough to allow him this time and space, but it really did work for him last year. I'm pretty sure his new-found maturity level also helped greatly with this.
Yesterday, when we were leaving the cottage, S told me that he and his brother and their three friends from the cottage had a big group hug as a way of saying good-bye to summer. Coping, learning and growing, I guess.
The start of another school year. I hope (and pray) it's finally a good one.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
A good meeting
At lunch time, I went to meet the new Principal. She was younger than I was expecting. I have no idea why I was expecting an older lady, but for whatever reason, I was.
I was very pleased to see that she had S's student record on her desk, and as we sat and chatted, she went through various sections of the record. Every now and then she would ask questions specific to the section she was looking at - such as suspensions.
It was pretty obvious from the start of the meeting that she has some educational background in special education. She knew things about Aspergers that the average teacher wouldn't now - unless they have either taught such a child, or had some formal training. I wasn't sure which is was until she made a few comments about his LD's, and his ADHD. Then I knew.
YES! (It really does help with the Principal has a good grasp of the issues.)
I was able to address my concerns about the EA and how Hubby and I had our reservations about her formal training. I used the fractured thumb incident as a "for example." The very first thing she said after I told her about that was, "Well, that is the worst thing you could say to a child like S - it would have made him even more anxious."
My heart did yet another happy dance.
I was told that funding has been cut (typical) and she would see what she could do to move the EA's around. For now, though, S will have the same EA as last year.
I also asked about the French teacher - were we going to have the same one? Answer - No. (yippeeee!!)
The Principal then told me that the SERT has requested to offer a Social Skills class, and would I be willing to have S participate in that? (Hmmm.... child with Aspergers and a Social Skills class - would that be helpful??) Of course I said that I would be pleased to have him take such a class, and then I was informed that the class would be offered at the same time of day as French would be. HA!
The SERT couldn't get S exempt from taking French, but she has come up with a viable way to have him excused from the class! :o)
I left the school feeling very positive.
Tonight, I had a minor anxiety attack when I couldn't locate S's records binder.
This binder is over two inches thick, and has to be upgraded to the next binder size. It is full of information pertaining to S - complete with his pshyco-educational report, all doctors reports, reports from his OT, his Play Therapist, all report cards, suspensions, letters to the school...in other words, it is not something you want to lose. I checked two spots then found it in the third.
When I had started to reorganize the boy's homework cabinet - putting away all the new school supplies - I found a number of pieces that needed to be filed in each boy's binder. I knew exactly where the A-man's was, but for some reason S's wasn't where it should have been.
Crisis has been diverted - now I just need to get a big binder and more sheet protectors.
(yes, I am a geek, I know...)
I was very pleased to see that she had S's student record on her desk, and as we sat and chatted, she went through various sections of the record. Every now and then she would ask questions specific to the section she was looking at - such as suspensions.
It was pretty obvious from the start of the meeting that she has some educational background in special education. She knew things about Aspergers that the average teacher wouldn't now - unless they have either taught such a child, or had some formal training. I wasn't sure which is was until she made a few comments about his LD's, and his ADHD. Then I knew.
YES! (It really does help with the Principal has a good grasp of the issues.)
I was able to address my concerns about the EA and how Hubby and I had our reservations about her formal training. I used the fractured thumb incident as a "for example." The very first thing she said after I told her about that was, "Well, that is the worst thing you could say to a child like S - it would have made him even more anxious."
My heart did yet another happy dance.
I was told that funding has been cut (typical) and she would see what she could do to move the EA's around. For now, though, S will have the same EA as last year.
I also asked about the French teacher - were we going to have the same one? Answer - No. (yippeeee!!)
The Principal then told me that the SERT has requested to offer a Social Skills class, and would I be willing to have S participate in that? (Hmmm.... child with Aspergers and a Social Skills class - would that be helpful??) Of course I said that I would be pleased to have him take such a class, and then I was informed that the class would be offered at the same time of day as French would be. HA!
The SERT couldn't get S exempt from taking French, but she has come up with a viable way to have him excused from the class! :o)
I left the school feeling very positive.
Tonight, I had a minor anxiety attack when I couldn't locate S's records binder.
This binder is over two inches thick, and has to be upgraded to the next binder size. It is full of information pertaining to S - complete with his pshyco-educational report, all doctors reports, reports from his OT, his Play Therapist, all report cards, suspensions, letters to the school...in other words, it is not something you want to lose. I checked two spots then found it in the third.
When I had started to reorganize the boy's homework cabinet - putting away all the new school supplies - I found a number of pieces that needed to be filed in each boy's binder. I knew exactly where the A-man's was, but for some reason S's wasn't where it should have been.
Crisis has been diverted - now I just need to get a big binder and more sheet protectors.
(yes, I am a geek, I know...)
My bully wish
The Bully Factor.
It would appear that it is a part of life, regardless of where you live. My dear friend Bear shared a blog excerpt with me today. It was written by a young man living with both bipolar and Aspergers.
In his blog he explained the vicious cycle whereby being a child with Aspergers caused the bulling, which caused the anxiety, which caused post traumatic stress, which then aggravated his bipolar, which then brought out even more Asperger symptoms. What a sad, sad, never ending cycle.
I'm not sure if his parents/guardians were aware of what he was going through when it was happening, but they must have been. How could they not? He was in a fight so bad that he ended up with a broken jaw!
If I could be granted just one wish, it wouldn't be that all bullying stopped - I think that would be next to impossible.
My wish would be that all people were educated about the seriousness, the full detrimental effect that bullying, teasing, and tormenting can have on a person. I do believe that the bully often times believes they are 'just having fun' and not truly aware of how their so-called 'fun' can be at the (very serious) expense of another human's mental well-being. If THAT awareness could be raised, I think the world might just be a better place.
If I could add an additional educational tag to this wish, I would also wish that all parents have the knowledge, the time and the willingness to do battle against a bully and the yeast that allows this spawn to continue to ferment.
Last Spring I spoke to the mother of a girl that was actually not in school for the last two months of the year because it was just easier than going through the proper channels to make the bully stop. I was so upset by this.
My feeling was that rather than showing her daughter that she was there to help her, she (in my opinion) was simply showing her, "Well, I can't do anything about it. Just stay home and avoid that group of girls."
I tried to educate this Mom in to the "proper procedures" that need to be followed within the board; basically how to work the system to her advantage. She listened to what I suggested, but I'm sure she was thinking, "That is just too much work." It was simply easier to keep the girl home.
Education. That is my wish.
It would appear that it is a part of life, regardless of where you live. My dear friend Bear shared a blog excerpt with me today. It was written by a young man living with both bipolar and Aspergers.
In his blog he explained the vicious cycle whereby being a child with Aspergers caused the bulling, which caused the anxiety, which caused post traumatic stress, which then aggravated his bipolar, which then brought out even more Asperger symptoms. What a sad, sad, never ending cycle.
I'm not sure if his parents/guardians were aware of what he was going through when it was happening, but they must have been. How could they not? He was in a fight so bad that he ended up with a broken jaw!
If I could be granted just one wish, it wouldn't be that all bullying stopped - I think that would be next to impossible.
My wish would be that all people were educated about the seriousness, the full detrimental effect that bullying, teasing, and tormenting can have on a person. I do believe that the bully often times believes they are 'just having fun' and not truly aware of how their so-called 'fun' can be at the (very serious) expense of another human's mental well-being. If THAT awareness could be raised, I think the world might just be a better place.
If I could add an additional educational tag to this wish, I would also wish that all parents have the knowledge, the time and the willingness to do battle against a bully and the yeast that allows this spawn to continue to ferment.
Last Spring I spoke to the mother of a girl that was actually not in school for the last two months of the year because it was just easier than going through the proper channels to make the bully stop. I was so upset by this.
My feeling was that rather than showing her daughter that she was there to help her, she (in my opinion) was simply showing her, "Well, I can't do anything about it. Just stay home and avoid that group of girls."
I tried to educate this Mom in to the "proper procedures" that need to be followed within the board; basically how to work the system to her advantage. She listened to what I suggested, but I'm sure she was thinking, "That is just too much work." It was simply easier to keep the girl home.
Education. That is my wish.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Will wonders never cease?
I got an email from S's SERT this morning - wanting to let me know that she was going to do her best to ensure that S has a good 'transitional' year - year between elementary school and high school. She also wanted to get some information about the series of events that unfolded at the end of the school year when she was on jury duty.
The strangest of all - she sent that email at about 11 o'clock at night.
I am going to call the new Principal this morning to go over some things. I have resolved that S will not have an underqualified EA this year. There has to be one SOMEWHERE in this Board that has the qualifications the doctor so clearly defined. I want that EA in our school.
~~
I've been up since 5:30 this morning. Too much going on in this head of mine. Between work and the looming first day of school, my stomach is just in knots.
S deserves to have a good year at school. He really truly does. In my reply email to the SERT, I indicated that neither of my sons will ever "look fondly back at their years in elementary school."
How sad it that? 10 years they spent at that school, and neither will have any positive memories. I don't know that things would have been different had we changed schools... and it's too late now to ponder that. Of course, Mommy guilt will always make me wonder...
The strangest of all - she sent that email at about 11 o'clock at night.
I am going to call the new Principal this morning to go over some things. I have resolved that S will not have an underqualified EA this year. There has to be one SOMEWHERE in this Board that has the qualifications the doctor so clearly defined. I want that EA in our school.
~~
I've been up since 5:30 this morning. Too much going on in this head of mine. Between work and the looming first day of school, my stomach is just in knots.
S deserves to have a good year at school. He really truly does. In my reply email to the SERT, I indicated that neither of my sons will ever "look fondly back at their years in elementary school."
How sad it that? 10 years they spent at that school, and neither will have any positive memories. I don't know that things would have been different had we changed schools... and it's too late now to ponder that. Of course, Mommy guilt will always make me wonder...
Monday, August 25, 2008
General ramblings and such
I guess it has been a while since I did a bit of an update on here.
Hubby and I had a lovely dinner on Thursday evening. It was actually a very nice date. The new Thai place we went to had quite a selection, and I think we both found it tough to decide what to have for dinner.
After dinner, we went shopping to buy Hubby some new clothes that actually fit him, then we came home a shared a nice bottle of wine. It wasn’t a big fan fare anniversary, but it was nice to just have some quite time together.
On Friday night we went and dismantled our new (to us…) swimming pool. I took pictures as the pool was taken down so that we would be sure to reassemble it properly. Saturday morning was sunny and beautiful, and by the end of the day, all of us were quite hot and tired. While Hubby and his friend did the tamping of the sand pad, and S the A-man and I shoveled the sand and took level measurements. Between having to do the level readings, I worked on yanking out some of the weeds in my badly neglected gardens. I am pleased to report that both S and the A-man helped quite a bit with the assembly, and by the time we called it a day, the pool walls were up.
Sunday was just as warm, and after a few fits, starts, adjustments and even a few curse words now and then (bad boy Hubby), we were able to start putting water in to the pool some time around 4 or 5, I guess. This morning Hubby started putting more water in to it shortly after 7. I will continue to fill it each evening when I return home from work. We aren’t going to actually fill the pool to a usable water level – we are more or less going to winterize it and then it will be ready for official opening some time in May. Bummer that we aren’t going to get to use it this year, but I know that the water simply won’t warm up enough to justify trying to get the chemical levels proper.
Throughout the day yesterday, I did laundry and also worked on cleaning up parts of the house. Hubby's parents stopped in after church to wish Hubby and I a happy anniversary. I felt a HUGE pang of guilt when my mother in law informed me that she hasn’t seen S & me since the end of June, and it has been since May when she last saw the A-man. I know we get up to the cottage a lot in the summer, so next year I am going to have to make a very conscious effort to stop and visit MIL more often. My Mom and Dad stopped in on their way home from the cottage to check out the new pool and to wish us a happy anniversary, also.
Overall, it was a very busy weekend. I have broken two nails, I’ve got dirt embedded in my skin, I actually ripped a chunk of skin out of one finger, and I feel like I actually got some things accomplished. :o)
I’m going to be calling S’s school this afternoon to make arrangements to meet with the new principal. I’ll admit it - I am VERY worried about having a new principal. Given the BS we went through the last time we had a new one…well, I guess my trepidation is somewhat understandable. At the end of the last school year, the acting principal told me that I have nothing to fear – he assured me that this new principal is very knowledgeable and understanding in respect to the special educational system. I’m hoping I can get a meeting on Wednesday; I really need to address the EA that S had working with him last year, and the possibility of a more suitable one for him this year.
Ughh… my belly hurts just thinking about the fact that we are starting all over again. The only silver lining I have is that I'm not as concerned about the A-man. His final report card from his second semester had him with two marks in the mid 80's and two in the mid 70's. He was a little disappointed in the 70's marks - figures he should have studied a bit more for the exams. I'm still thinking I can live with that. I don't have any concerns with respect to him anymore. Thankfully.
Hubby and I had a lovely dinner on Thursday evening. It was actually a very nice date. The new Thai place we went to had quite a selection, and I think we both found it tough to decide what to have for dinner.
After dinner, we went shopping to buy Hubby some new clothes that actually fit him, then we came home a shared a nice bottle of wine. It wasn’t a big fan fare anniversary, but it was nice to just have some quite time together.
On Friday night we went and dismantled our new (to us…) swimming pool. I took pictures as the pool was taken down so that we would be sure to reassemble it properly. Saturday morning was sunny and beautiful, and by the end of the day, all of us were quite hot and tired. While Hubby and his friend did the tamping of the sand pad, and S the A-man and I shoveled the sand and took level measurements. Between having to do the level readings, I worked on yanking out some of the weeds in my badly neglected gardens. I am pleased to report that both S and the A-man helped quite a bit with the assembly, and by the time we called it a day, the pool walls were up.
Sunday was just as warm, and after a few fits, starts, adjustments and even a few curse words now and then (bad boy Hubby), we were able to start putting water in to the pool some time around 4 or 5, I guess. This morning Hubby started putting more water in to it shortly after 7. I will continue to fill it each evening when I return home from work. We aren’t going to actually fill the pool to a usable water level – we are more or less going to winterize it and then it will be ready for official opening some time in May. Bummer that we aren’t going to get to use it this year, but I know that the water simply won’t warm up enough to justify trying to get the chemical levels proper.
Throughout the day yesterday, I did laundry and also worked on cleaning up parts of the house. Hubby's parents stopped in after church to wish Hubby and I a happy anniversary. I felt a HUGE pang of guilt when my mother in law informed me that she hasn’t seen S & me since the end of June, and it has been since May when she last saw the A-man. I know we get up to the cottage a lot in the summer, so next year I am going to have to make a very conscious effort to stop and visit MIL more often. My Mom and Dad stopped in on their way home from the cottage to check out the new pool and to wish us a happy anniversary, also.
Overall, it was a very busy weekend. I have broken two nails, I’ve got dirt embedded in my skin, I actually ripped a chunk of skin out of one finger, and I feel like I actually got some things accomplished. :o)
I’m going to be calling S’s school this afternoon to make arrangements to meet with the new principal. I’ll admit it - I am VERY worried about having a new principal. Given the BS we went through the last time we had a new one…well, I guess my trepidation is somewhat understandable. At the end of the last school year, the acting principal told me that I have nothing to fear – he assured me that this new principal is very knowledgeable and understanding in respect to the special educational system. I’m hoping I can get a meeting on Wednesday; I really need to address the EA that S had working with him last year, and the possibility of a more suitable one for him this year.
Ughh… my belly hurts just thinking about the fact that we are starting all over again. The only silver lining I have is that I'm not as concerned about the A-man. His final report card from his second semester had him with two marks in the mid 80's and two in the mid 70's. He was a little disappointed in the 70's marks - figures he should have studied a bit more for the exams. I'm still thinking I can live with that. I don't have any concerns with respect to him anymore. Thankfully.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
The Fall Out
S took the news better than I thought he might. I guess he had cried when the principal told him he wasn't able to go, but afterwards he was fine. Well, still sad, but not as upset as I thought he would have been.
The principal told S that Hubby and I were too busy to go with him - which annoyed me. I explained to S that I would have been happy to go with him if I had been given a little bit more notice, and I also told him why Hubby wasn't able to go. S knows we will do whatever we can for him, so I felt it a little unfair of the Principal to try and turn it back on us.
S and I also had a conversation about how is actions can cause certain reactions. Of course, he wasn't in an agitated state, so he could rationalize all of it. In an agitated state, not so much. But, maybe this will be another learning tool for him to put in his case. I hope so.
I went to Bear's son's "graduation" last night. I know how excited the A-man was to be finished Grade 8, and I was honoured to have been invited. Magiver won three awards! The sportsmanship award, the Principal award, and the Leadership award. Quite the prestigious awards, I thought. He is such a great kid. The A-man was happy to hear his friend did so well. It was nice to have a 'good' ending to an otherwise not-so-good day.
Today is another sunny, beautiful day. I hope it goes better than yesterday did. I have a number of interviews today with prospective assistants. The one we met with yesterday was quite impressive - I think he may even be a call back.
The principal told S that Hubby and I were too busy to go with him - which annoyed me. I explained to S that I would have been happy to go with him if I had been given a little bit more notice, and I also told him why Hubby wasn't able to go. S knows we will do whatever we can for him, so I felt it a little unfair of the Principal to try and turn it back on us.
S and I also had a conversation about how is actions can cause certain reactions. Of course, he wasn't in an agitated state, so he could rationalize all of it. In an agitated state, not so much. But, maybe this will be another learning tool for him to put in his case. I hope so.
I went to Bear's son's "graduation" last night. I know how excited the A-man was to be finished Grade 8, and I was honoured to have been invited. Magiver won three awards! The sportsmanship award, the Principal award, and the Leadership award. Quite the prestigious awards, I thought. He is such a great kid. The A-man was happy to hear his friend did so well. It was nice to have a 'good' ending to an otherwise not-so-good day.
Today is another sunny, beautiful day. I hope it goes better than yesterday did. I have a number of interviews today with prospective assistants. The one we met with yesterday was quite impressive - I think he may even be a call back.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Past Weekend
The family headed up to the cottage again this past weekend. (Actually, that is where we are going to be for the next few weekends!)
The thing that was unique for us this weekend was that my parents weren't there. They had a wedding to attend, so it was just our family of 4. Hubby and I both had a nice time, and I know the boys always have fun when we are there.
The cottage is actually located on a native reserve. Saturday was Aboriginal Day. We didn't get over to the pow wow on Saturday, though. The boys had asked permission to go, but by the time they started out, the event was already done. The evening fireworks, however, was something the entire family was able to go to. Other than the mosquitoes being bad just prior to the start of the display, I would have to say it was an incredible night! For such a small reserve, they certainly did not spare any expense to celebrate. I was really glad we made it over there.
Today was the A-man's last exam. He is very happy that he is no longer "a dumb niner" and will soon be in the double digits of grades. I hadn't thought about that until he mentioned that at dinner, but I guess that is the case.
S didn't go to school today. Given the turn of events on Friday, and then knowing that today was going to be the Grade 8 graduation - at the choas that goes with that - I opted to have him stay home and simply take it easy. Again, I know they wouldn't be doing any actual work, so I didn't feel like I was a bad parent. Sometimes staying home and out of the excitement is just what he needs.
S is going to go to school tomorrow, though. He wants to show his EA that he can have a good day - a day without incidents - so that she won't be so nervous about him going on the mountain biking expedition on Wednesday. He is very excited about getting to do that. I'm not sure if he will go on the last day, so I will get him to make sure his desk is empty tomorrow - just in case.
I am off on holidays next week, so the boys and I are going to head up to the cottage on Thursday night. Hubby is working nights, so he won't be arriving until late Saturday morning. We will likely stay at the cottage until Canada Day (July 1st) but a lot of what we do will depend on my sister in law. She is visiting from England and I know the boys will not want to miss the chance to see their favourite aunt. We will likely head back on Thursday or Friday of the next weekend to finish off our holidays.
Can you tell we love it up there??
The thing that was unique for us this weekend was that my parents weren't there. They had a wedding to attend, so it was just our family of 4. Hubby and I both had a nice time, and I know the boys always have fun when we are there.
The cottage is actually located on a native reserve. Saturday was Aboriginal Day. We didn't get over to the pow wow on Saturday, though. The boys had asked permission to go, but by the time they started out, the event was already done. The evening fireworks, however, was something the entire family was able to go to. Other than the mosquitoes being bad just prior to the start of the display, I would have to say it was an incredible night! For such a small reserve, they certainly did not spare any expense to celebrate. I was really glad we made it over there.
Today was the A-man's last exam. He is very happy that he is no longer "a dumb niner" and will soon be in the double digits of grades. I hadn't thought about that until he mentioned that at dinner, but I guess that is the case.
S didn't go to school today. Given the turn of events on Friday, and then knowing that today was going to be the Grade 8 graduation - at the choas that goes with that - I opted to have him stay home and simply take it easy. Again, I know they wouldn't be doing any actual work, so I didn't feel like I was a bad parent. Sometimes staying home and out of the excitement is just what he needs.
S is going to go to school tomorrow, though. He wants to show his EA that he can have a good day - a day without incidents - so that she won't be so nervous about him going on the mountain biking expedition on Wednesday. He is very excited about getting to do that. I'm not sure if he will go on the last day, so I will get him to make sure his desk is empty tomorrow - just in case.
I am off on holidays next week, so the boys and I are going to head up to the cottage on Thursday night. Hubby is working nights, so he won't be arriving until late Saturday morning. We will likely stay at the cottage until Canada Day (July 1st) but a lot of what we do will depend on my sister in law. She is visiting from England and I know the boys will not want to miss the chance to see their favourite aunt. We will likely head back on Thursday or Friday of the next weekend to finish off our holidays.
Can you tell we love it up there??
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Normalacy
Yesterday, when I got home from work, the A-man was VERY quick to tell me that he had something to tell me.
He then proceeded to tell me that earier in the day, he had gone to his Health class, and apparently the entire class waited outside the portable, and the teacher never showed up. He claims that he also went to the gym, looking for his teacher, but no teacher was to be found. He said after waiting “like half an hour” (so, in reality about 5 minutes) he and his friend decided to just go over to my parent’s house until their next class.
Yeah – the school’s automated system had called home, and I guess the A-man took the phone call. My thinking is that he thought that if he told me about it before I heard from the school, he would be in the clear.
I didn’t get angry with him. What would be the point? He said a couple of kids from the class were teasing him today – “Ewww, you skipped…” but there was no further punishment from the teacher or Vice Principal. Apparently it was a substitute teacher that arrived shortly after the A-man headed for the hills.
Do I believe the story? Not bloody likely. Do I think he maybe realized that I would find out when/if he were to skip a class? Yeah, I think he did. Will he skip again? As if that is never going to happen – for sure he will.
He’s NORMAL – that is what normal kids do.
Thank heaven’s my son is NORMAL!
Today, during 4th period, I think, the high school held an “Oscar’s” type of awards ceremony. It was held for all of the kids that have taken any of the Arts program over the past school year. During the awards, the A-man was surprised (and flattered) to discover he had been nominated by his Drama teacher for “Most Improved Junior.” There were three Grade 9 students nominated in the category.
He didn’t win, but he was still quite pleased that his teacher felt he deserved to be nominated.
S had some homework last night – he had to put together a polygon. 20 sides to a polygon… he cut the piece out, and he did give it his best attempt, but fine motor skills are not exactly S’s forté.
He ‘forgot’ his finished piece when he left this morning, but assured me that he was given time in class, and he choose to do a less complicated shape in class today.
I am just amazed at how CALM he is this year. His anxiety levels have completely lessened, and he doesn’t get himself in to knots about the smallest things anymore.
Last year, if had forgotten that piece, I would have been getting a panic phone call from school telling me that I simply HAD to go and get that and bring it to school for him. This year, he just takes so much more in stride. He has come such a long way in such a short period of time.
What a relief!
He then proceeded to tell me that earier in the day, he had gone to his Health class, and apparently the entire class waited outside the portable, and the teacher never showed up. He claims that he also went to the gym, looking for his teacher, but no teacher was to be found. He said after waiting “like half an hour” (so, in reality about 5 minutes) he and his friend decided to just go over to my parent’s house until their next class.
Yeah – the school’s automated system had called home, and I guess the A-man took the phone call. My thinking is that he thought that if he told me about it before I heard from the school, he would be in the clear.
I didn’t get angry with him. What would be the point? He said a couple of kids from the class were teasing him today – “Ewww, you skipped…” but there was no further punishment from the teacher or Vice Principal. Apparently it was a substitute teacher that arrived shortly after the A-man headed for the hills.
Do I believe the story? Not bloody likely. Do I think he maybe realized that I would find out when/if he were to skip a class? Yeah, I think he did. Will he skip again? As if that is never going to happen – for sure he will.
He’s NORMAL – that is what normal kids do.
Thank heaven’s my son is NORMAL!
Today, during 4th period, I think, the high school held an “Oscar’s” type of awards ceremony. It was held for all of the kids that have taken any of the Arts program over the past school year. During the awards, the A-man was surprised (and flattered) to discover he had been nominated by his Drama teacher for “Most Improved Junior.” There were three Grade 9 students nominated in the category.
He didn’t win, but he was still quite pleased that his teacher felt he deserved to be nominated.
S had some homework last night – he had to put together a polygon. 20 sides to a polygon… he cut the piece out, and he did give it his best attempt, but fine motor skills are not exactly S’s forté.
He ‘forgot’ his finished piece when he left this morning, but assured me that he was given time in class, and he choose to do a less complicated shape in class today.
I am just amazed at how CALM he is this year. His anxiety levels have completely lessened, and he doesn’t get himself in to knots about the smallest things anymore.
Last year, if had forgotten that piece, I would have been getting a panic phone call from school telling me that I simply HAD to go and get that and bring it to school for him. This year, he just takes so much more in stride. He has come such a long way in such a short period of time.
What a relief!
Thursday, May 22, 2008
New execptionality
I had an IPRC meeting on Tuesday for S. This was a standard, “have it every Spring,” type of meeting, so it wasn’t something that I really had to prepare for.
Given the report from the hospital – and the results of the fMRI – the school wanted to change S’s exceptionality from “Multiple” to “Autism”.
The multiple part of his exceptionality was to encompass his learning disabilities and his anxiety disorder, which can often account for the negative behaviour. The school suggested that we change over to the Autism area of the IPRC, because they felt it would better encompass his newly diagnosis of Aspergers.
I was a little hesitant about signing off on this change, for obvious reasons. This has finally been a good year for him. He has been having a very successful year, and I am positive that this has happened because of all of the accommodations that are in place for him. I did not want to see any of these be taken away from him.
I asked, time and time again, at the meeting for the reassurance that changing his exceptionality would not change the accommodations that are in place. I also wanted to make sure that all of the past IPRC reports would remain in his OSR. He will be going in to his ‘transition’ year next year – and a new school the following year. I do not want to have to start the battle again come Grade 9. I have been assured that all of the records will remain in the file; therefore the high school will have access to all of these files.
I have been stewing about it this for almost a week. (I had even broached the subject at my board meeting last week.) One lady on the board told me that the school is likely pushing for the Autism exceptionality because there is so much more funding available to the school through the Ministry of Education. After talking with everyone at the board meeting, and then at the school meeting, I decided that I would sign off on the new exceptionality. The end result is the same – he needs accommodations, we know why he needs them, we know what has (and has not) worked in the past, and I will continue to ensure all of that continues to happen. WHY he is exceptional doesn’t really matter. I also have copies of all of the information in his OSR, and if something should go missing, it will be amazing how quick another copy will arrive.
Considering the success the A-man has been having in high school, I don’t think the transition will be that difficult. The school has an amazing head of resource, and I am sure it will be good for S, too.
Given the report from the hospital – and the results of the fMRI – the school wanted to change S’s exceptionality from “Multiple” to “Autism”.
The multiple part of his exceptionality was to encompass his learning disabilities and his anxiety disorder, which can often account for the negative behaviour. The school suggested that we change over to the Autism area of the IPRC, because they felt it would better encompass his newly diagnosis of Aspergers.
I was a little hesitant about signing off on this change, for obvious reasons. This has finally been a good year for him. He has been having a very successful year, and I am positive that this has happened because of all of the accommodations that are in place for him. I did not want to see any of these be taken away from him.
I asked, time and time again, at the meeting for the reassurance that changing his exceptionality would not change the accommodations that are in place. I also wanted to make sure that all of the past IPRC reports would remain in his OSR. He will be going in to his ‘transition’ year next year – and a new school the following year. I do not want to have to start the battle again come Grade 9. I have been assured that all of the records will remain in the file; therefore the high school will have access to all of these files.
I have been stewing about it this for almost a week. (I had even broached the subject at my board meeting last week.) One lady on the board told me that the school is likely pushing for the Autism exceptionality because there is so much more funding available to the school through the Ministry of Education. After talking with everyone at the board meeting, and then at the school meeting, I decided that I would sign off on the new exceptionality. The end result is the same – he needs accommodations, we know why he needs them, we know what has (and has not) worked in the past, and I will continue to ensure all of that continues to happen. WHY he is exceptional doesn’t really matter. I also have copies of all of the information in his OSR, and if something should go missing, it will be amazing how quick another copy will arrive.
Considering the success the A-man has been having in high school, I don’t think the transition will be that difficult. The school has an amazing head of resource, and I am sure it will be good for S, too.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Weekend update
Just when I think things are showing signs of improvement, one little event comes along to just give me a tap on the head and provide me with reminders.
On Saturday, we went to my parent’s cottage for the weekend. This is a great place – the whole family has a great time there, and have ever since my parents bought it 5 years ago. We have been going there for 5 seasons with no major concerns.
S and the A-man have made friends with some of the local kids, and they are often gone for most of the weekend – or they have friends over to either go swimming or fishing, or during rainy days, or chilly days, to watch movies. This has been the norm.
On Saturday, after dinner, one little girl – my parent’s neighbour – came in and was trying to get the A-man to come with her. S was out, over at his friend’s house, and we all just assumed that she wanted the A-man to come and play too. (He’d had enough of the ‘little kids’ for a while, and was content to sit and read his book.) She was very insistent that the A-man comes with her – which is not like this girl.
I asked her what was going on – why did she need the A-man to come with her. Then she told me that S was in a fight down by the corner store, and she wanted the A-man to come and help his brother.
Well, the mamma lion didn’t need a second word to come out. I had my shoes on, and was heading out the door as I told her that I would be going to help S.
When I got to the area, S and two friends were surrounded by a number of boys that I have never met before. The little neighbour girl filled me in on what had transpired prior to the ‘fight’ and it appeared to me that the other boys instigated the turn of events, but knowing S as I do, I also knew he would (or rather COULD) make things far worse than should be.
When I arrived, there were a number of conflicting stories about what had transpired. I could tell S was still quite heated and agitated, so after a few minutes, I suggested that he just head back to the cottage, and I leave me to talk with the others.
I don’t know if the conversation we had did any good, but my hope is that these boys don’t start anything with him again. The cottage is the one place that S has always felt ‘normal’ and like he belonged.
He’s never had to deal with bully issues, he has always had friends, and he has always enjoyed the freedom of being able to come and go and just hang out with friends. The one boy actually turned out to be one of the friends S had made during a weekend camp last year. I asked him why he had started to pick on S, and he said that he didn’t, but S just over-reacted to something. I hope that is the case, and we don’t see a repeat of this event again.
As I was walking back to the cottage, S’s friends told me that the other boys had started it, and they are known to be ‘jerks’ at the local school. I had a nice long conversation with S, about what happened, how he could have done things differently, that sort of thing. (How much of it will actually sink in and remain is a whole other story, so we shall see.)
Kids… gotta love’em.
Mother’s Day was nice – I got a card from the boys, and S went out and picked me a lovely bouquet of ‘wildflowers’ – aka dandelions. My mom and I worked on cleaning out a scrubby area in the back edge of the property, and we just generally had a very productive day. When I arrived back home last night, I was beat.
And, onward to another week…
On Saturday, we went to my parent’s cottage for the weekend. This is a great place – the whole family has a great time there, and have ever since my parents bought it 5 years ago. We have been going there for 5 seasons with no major concerns.
S and the A-man have made friends with some of the local kids, and they are often gone for most of the weekend – or they have friends over to either go swimming or fishing, or during rainy days, or chilly days, to watch movies. This has been the norm.
On Saturday, after dinner, one little girl – my parent’s neighbour – came in and was trying to get the A-man to come with her. S was out, over at his friend’s house, and we all just assumed that she wanted the A-man to come and play too. (He’d had enough of the ‘little kids’ for a while, and was content to sit and read his book.) She was very insistent that the A-man comes with her – which is not like this girl.
I asked her what was going on – why did she need the A-man to come with her. Then she told me that S was in a fight down by the corner store, and she wanted the A-man to come and help his brother.
Well, the mamma lion didn’t need a second word to come out. I had my shoes on, and was heading out the door as I told her that I would be going to help S.
When I got to the area, S and two friends were surrounded by a number of boys that I have never met before. The little neighbour girl filled me in on what had transpired prior to the ‘fight’ and it appeared to me that the other boys instigated the turn of events, but knowing S as I do, I also knew he would (or rather COULD) make things far worse than should be.
When I arrived, there were a number of conflicting stories about what had transpired. I could tell S was still quite heated and agitated, so after a few minutes, I suggested that he just head back to the cottage, and I leave me to talk with the others.
I don’t know if the conversation we had did any good, but my hope is that these boys don’t start anything with him again. The cottage is the one place that S has always felt ‘normal’ and like he belonged.
He’s never had to deal with bully issues, he has always had friends, and he has always enjoyed the freedom of being able to come and go and just hang out with friends. The one boy actually turned out to be one of the friends S had made during a weekend camp last year. I asked him why he had started to pick on S, and he said that he didn’t, but S just over-reacted to something. I hope that is the case, and we don’t see a repeat of this event again.
As I was walking back to the cottage, S’s friends told me that the other boys had started it, and they are known to be ‘jerks’ at the local school. I had a nice long conversation with S, about what happened, how he could have done things differently, that sort of thing. (How much of it will actually sink in and remain is a whole other story, so we shall see.)
Kids… gotta love’em.
Mother’s Day was nice – I got a card from the boys, and S went out and picked me a lovely bouquet of ‘wildflowers’ – aka dandelions. My mom and I worked on cleaning out a scrubby area in the back edge of the property, and we just generally had a very productive day. When I arrived back home last night, I was beat.
And, onward to another week…
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