Yesterday was the first ever Family Day I have been home since the new holiday began three years ago. The last two years I have been in Mississippi at the Governor's Conference. The Conference was moved to two weeks later... and I'm not going to it this year since I'm leaving the company.
Anyway - since it was Family Day, I told the boys that if they helped with the house tidy in the morning, we would be able to use the afternoon to have some fun. Hubby and I thought Family Winter Olympics on the Wii would be suiting since the Olympics are here in Canada right now.
S was looking forward to playing his actual Olympics game. After everyone was ready, we got started. The boys both had a turn at the skiing event. Next up was Hubby and I. We asked the A-man about the proper way to hold the romotes for this particular game, and the next thing we knew, S was having a MAJOR melt down. He actually stormed off upstairs to "calm down before (he) screams his head off."
Yeah - we sort of lost the joy of the game at this point.
Hubby turned the game off, and we decided to find a movie to watch instead. I'm still not sure what brought on that explosion, but I just felt it was best to carry on and not bring it up again.
We had a pretty good weekend, though. Hubby and I helped Nee move over the weekend. She actually asked a crew of people to help her, and by the time we left on Saturday night, she was moved in and set up other than a few pictures on the walls.
Sunday the A-man had asked R out on a bowling date. Nothing like a date with your parents and little brother along for fun. We had a good time that afternoon. Sunday evening was a chilling by the fireplace kind of night.
And now another work week begins...
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Changes
Last week was a big week of changes in our household.
Thursday was the start of a new semester for the boys. S took advantage of his IEP during exams and actually had a scribe for both his Geography and Science exams. He felt very good about the Science exam, but wasn't as confident with his Geography one, however. He did spend a fair bit of time studying, so I hope he gets a good mark. (Geography was never a strong subject for me, either, so I understand that struggle.)
This semester he has Math, English, Phys-ed and Religion. Again, a nice mix of tough and not-so-tough courses. I've not sent my "letter of introduction" to his teachers, but I think I will send that with him next week.
The A-man feels very confident that he will have 80's in all of his classes except English. He's not quite sure what to expect in that class. Apparently he did quite well on the essay prep he had to do prior to the exam, so I'm hoping that he is pleasantly surprised at the end of it.
I guess we will know for sure next week.
Thursday was also a big day for me as I less Boss know that I had accepted a new position. I am actually not even aware of a start date yet, but I know it won't be until the middle of March at the earliest. I'm sort of hoping that I will have a lag between leaving this job and starting the new one; the kids would be on March break that week, and it would be really nice to have a full week off to get some organizing done around the house. But, as I said, nothing has been set as of yet.
My leaving came as a very big shock to Boss. And an even bigger one to my assistant. I explained to her - privately - that I was very confident in her abilities and that knowing she was in place was actually a factor in my decision. Of course, there were quite a number of factors, but it's good to know you are not actually leaving the company in a lurch. Especially when the company works with such a small crew.
Boss took me to lunch on Monday to discuss things further. I guess he'd had the weekend to digest the information and he wanted to use the private conversation to feel me out for what type of job I would be doing, the pay difference, that sort of thing. When I told him the pay I would be receiving at the new job, he realized that he would not be able to match it. I knew this - and had he surprised me and tried to match the pay - I'm not even sure what I would have done to be honest!
-----
On a different note, Hubby and I have some issues we have to work through with our darling S. Over the Christmas break S and I had a bit of a disagreement about the quality of time he had put into completing an assignment. After our discussion, I had gone to bed.
A short while later, Hubby came upstairs to find S standing near my purse, with a $20 bill in his hand. Hubby LOST it. He never yells - or very rarely - and he hollered so loud at S that he woke me up.
I was not privy to the discussion Hubby had with S - I thought the cooler head was dealing with the situation, so I left it alone. Of course, Hubby and I did discuss it later, but at the time I knew the right parent came across that situation. S and I did have a brief follow up discussion about the series of events that lead up to that, and he explained to me that he had never done such a thing before, and he wasn't really sure why he did it that night other than he was upset with me and that it was something he did on impulse.
My knowledge of ADHD does permit me to believe that this was an impulse, but it also doesn't allow me to not punish him and remind him that stealing is illegal.
On the week that Hubby and I were on holidays, and the boys stayed with my parents, my Dad noticed that three $2 coins went missing off his side table. When he mentioned it to Hubby and I, we both knew right away who to talk to. Of course my Dad did mention the missing change to both of the boys at the time and both claimed no knowledge of the event. Dad knew the money was gone, but he also had no knowledge of the event at Christmas, so he wasn't sure who wasn't telling the truth.
Hubby had a serious conversation with S to follow up on my Dad's situation, and then I dealt with it in a whole other way. When I gave the boys their bi-weekly allowance, I short changed S. When he asked me why he didn't get his normal amount, I told him the money he had taken from my Dad was an advance.
His head went down, his cheeks flushed, and I believe I made an impact.
I certainly hope so.
------
And, on a totally separate issue again - poor Nee was required to take very drastic measures with J. He was admitted to a youth centre for emergency treatment. He will be released at the end of this week, I believe, but when he was in for the past three weeks, he has been under 24 hour surveillance with no access to cigarettes, alcohol or drugs. He has also been receiving therapy and testings that would normally take upward of a year to receive.
On the down side, Nee and her partner have separated and she will be moving into a new place this weekend. J and her partner had an altercation before the New Year, and now he doesn't want J in his house. Ever.
What is a mother to do? Well, naturally she had no choice - her decision was made when he wasn't willing to come to a compromise.
My heart is breaking for my friend, and I am hopeful that some answers will arrive when J is released.
Thursday was the start of a new semester for the boys. S took advantage of his IEP during exams and actually had a scribe for both his Geography and Science exams. He felt very good about the Science exam, but wasn't as confident with his Geography one, however. He did spend a fair bit of time studying, so I hope he gets a good mark. (Geography was never a strong subject for me, either, so I understand that struggle.)
This semester he has Math, English, Phys-ed and Religion. Again, a nice mix of tough and not-so-tough courses. I've not sent my "letter of introduction" to his teachers, but I think I will send that with him next week.
The A-man feels very confident that he will have 80's in all of his classes except English. He's not quite sure what to expect in that class. Apparently he did quite well on the essay prep he had to do prior to the exam, so I'm hoping that he is pleasantly surprised at the end of it.
I guess we will know for sure next week.
Thursday was also a big day for me as I less Boss know that I had accepted a new position. I am actually not even aware of a start date yet, but I know it won't be until the middle of March at the earliest. I'm sort of hoping that I will have a lag between leaving this job and starting the new one; the kids would be on March break that week, and it would be really nice to have a full week off to get some organizing done around the house. But, as I said, nothing has been set as of yet.
My leaving came as a very big shock to Boss. And an even bigger one to my assistant. I explained to her - privately - that I was very confident in her abilities and that knowing she was in place was actually a factor in my decision. Of course, there were quite a number of factors, but it's good to know you are not actually leaving the company in a lurch. Especially when the company works with such a small crew.
Boss took me to lunch on Monday to discuss things further. I guess he'd had the weekend to digest the information and he wanted to use the private conversation to feel me out for what type of job I would be doing, the pay difference, that sort of thing. When I told him the pay I would be receiving at the new job, he realized that he would not be able to match it. I knew this - and had he surprised me and tried to match the pay - I'm not even sure what I would have done to be honest!
-----
On a different note, Hubby and I have some issues we have to work through with our darling S. Over the Christmas break S and I had a bit of a disagreement about the quality of time he had put into completing an assignment. After our discussion, I had gone to bed.
A short while later, Hubby came upstairs to find S standing near my purse, with a $20 bill in his hand. Hubby LOST it. He never yells - or very rarely - and he hollered so loud at S that he woke me up.
I was not privy to the discussion Hubby had with S - I thought the cooler head was dealing with the situation, so I left it alone. Of course, Hubby and I did discuss it later, but at the time I knew the right parent came across that situation. S and I did have a brief follow up discussion about the series of events that lead up to that, and he explained to me that he had never done such a thing before, and he wasn't really sure why he did it that night other than he was upset with me and that it was something he did on impulse.
My knowledge of ADHD does permit me to believe that this was an impulse, but it also doesn't allow me to not punish him and remind him that stealing is illegal.
On the week that Hubby and I were on holidays, and the boys stayed with my parents, my Dad noticed that three $2 coins went missing off his side table. When he mentioned it to Hubby and I, we both knew right away who to talk to. Of course my Dad did mention the missing change to both of the boys at the time and both claimed no knowledge of the event. Dad knew the money was gone, but he also had no knowledge of the event at Christmas, so he wasn't sure who wasn't telling the truth.
Hubby had a serious conversation with S to follow up on my Dad's situation, and then I dealt with it in a whole other way. When I gave the boys their bi-weekly allowance, I short changed S. When he asked me why he didn't get his normal amount, I told him the money he had taken from my Dad was an advance.
His head went down, his cheeks flushed, and I believe I made an impact.
I certainly hope so.
------
And, on a totally separate issue again - poor Nee was required to take very drastic measures with J. He was admitted to a youth centre for emergency treatment. He will be released at the end of this week, I believe, but when he was in for the past three weeks, he has been under 24 hour surveillance with no access to cigarettes, alcohol or drugs. He has also been receiving therapy and testings that would normally take upward of a year to receive.
On the down side, Nee and her partner have separated and she will be moving into a new place this weekend. J and her partner had an altercation before the New Year, and now he doesn't want J in his house. Ever.
What is a mother to do? Well, naturally she had no choice - her decision was made when he wasn't willing to come to a compromise.
My heart is breaking for my friend, and I am hopeful that some answers will arrive when J is released.
Labels:
adhd,
better perspective,
friend,
iep,
mental health,
social skills,
support systems,
teenager
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